


A couple of firsts and a second

by Bbllaanncchhee2110



Category: Good Girls (TV)
Genre: F/M, First Kiss, First Time, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-09-25
Packaged: 2019-06-28 07:36:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 38,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15702753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bbllaanncchhee2110/pseuds/Bbllaanncchhee2110
Summary: This is a story about a couple of firsts and one second that Beth and Rio experience.This story is completed!





	1. Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> This starts out along the lines of the show, detailing some scenes that I wished for to be different. This is also why it starts pretty explicit. I hope I will manage to let the plot thicken as the story continues. So stick with me.

The first time they kiss is on the night after she leaves the pearls at the warehouse. She sits in the dark staring at the ceiling with a glass of bourbon beside her on the coffee table. She has tried the DVR and she has tried with the book she has started a few weeks earlier – pre Fine and Frugal – but she simply cannot concentrate. She is worrying. Are they in or out? How will she pay the mortgage? What is Rio going to do? And if Rio doesn’t react: How the hell will she go back to her boring housewife existence? She just can’t, she’d much rather die. 

She has left the back door unlocked for him and when she hears it open and then close again, relief floods through her and she cannot keep the corners of her mouth from twitching upwards the tiniest fraction. She walks into the kitchen, gets herself a fresh glass, not bothering to offer him a drink because she may have left the door open but she certainly hasn’t invited him in. Technically. It’s all about keeping the pretense up. While she pours herself a drink he gives her a once-over, eyes lingering on her boobs for just a second before he makes eye-contact. 

“You know the tradition is Jordans over a phone line, right?” he asks in his quiet seductive voice. 

“I only had pumps,” she answers raising one copper eyebrow in challenge. 

“Fair enough,” he smirks, “So what you wanna talk to me about?” 

“We want back in!” 

He raises one angular eyebrow. “Is that so?” 

She nods.

“I’ll think about it.” He turns to leave. That’s not sufficient for her. She has bills to pay, a family to bring through. Her children are counting on her. “Wait,” she calls out, he stills. “You can count on us. We really need the cash.” He tilts is head the tiniest fraction before walking on. That must have been his interpretation of a nod and she almost shouts out in jubilation. He is going to let them in again. They are going to keep working together. Goodbye debts, goodbye Dean, goodbye housewife hell. 

When he reaches the back door, he stops with his hand on the door handle. “I almost forgot,” he says, turning around and walking towards her. One hand reaches into the pocket of his hoodie. Her heart rate peaks, she stumbles back, her hands fly to her mouth stifling a scream. She just knows he is reaching for his gun. She has pushed him too far. She should have left him alone, should have taken the out he has handed to her. And now he’s getting ready to kill that insufferable redhead that keeps talking back at him and fucking up. Why didn’t she just keep her mouth shut? Why did she have to poke the gangster? But instead of his gold-plated gun he produces a small grey box. He lifts the top and lets it fall to the ground. She can see her pearls lying in the box. He takes the necklace out and lets the box fall as well. He takes the necklace on both ends as if to put it on her and walks around the kitchen island towards her. So, he is not going to shoot her but strangle her with her own necklace. It figures. Way less cleaning up afterwards. 

However, he does not strangle her. He simply reaches around her and fastens the chain of pearls around her neck. With the job done one hand wanders into her hair, grabbing a fistful and forcing her head upwards, while the other hand sneaks around her waist and pulls her towards him. The feel of his rock-solid body against hers is exquisite. She looks him in the eye for the fraction of a second before looking away hastily. She blushes violently. She can feel her heartbeat in her throat. Her breathing quickens, her nipples harden, wetness begins to pool in her panties. During their short time of doing business together she has often thought to herself that he was extraordinarily handsome in an exotic and dangerous way, but she could never have foreseen that he would have this kind of effect on her. 

“You must be so bored, Mamma,” he growls before he kisses her. Before actively deciding to, she kisses him back fiercely. Her hands come to his stomach and sneak underneath the hoodie. She can feel warm, smooth skin stretching over taut muscles. She cannot help but feel that he wasn’t expecting this kind of reaction from her, because when her fingertips touch his skin he lowly moans into her mouth. Her nerves are on fire, she is beyond turned on, ready to be taken right here on the counter of the very same kitchen she picked out with her soon to be ex-husband. When Rio pulls back his breathing is ragged, she can barely keep herself on her feet, her knees are week and she sways a little. “That was – unexpected,” she pants. “No shit,” he says, while lifting her off the ground and sitting her down on the kitchen island, making sure she doesn’t fall. “See you around, Mamma,” he mumbles against her ear before placing one last kiss on her temple. He turns around and walks out of her house. 

 

He steals a few kisses from her here and there when nobody is around. For instance, during Kenny’s party. They barely have time to get some space between the two of them before Dean bursts into the room and Beth is ready to kill the fucker, because the effect that Rio’s kisses have on her doesn’t diminish. The moment his lips touch hers, she is ready to go. It is embarrassing. Within seconds her nipples are so hard they hurt and she gets so wet that she actually has to change panties as soon as she is alone again. Heat rushes to her cheeks and breathing becomes an exceptionally hard thing to do. So, the moment their lips part she is a hot, quivering, flustered mess and she is embarrassed as hell.


	2. Come

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another first. This time in Beth's mamma van.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for leaving kudos or comments. They really made my day and encouraged me quite a lot. 
> 
> Okay: Here comes the smut. Enjoy.

The first time he makes her come is after Agent Turner has confronted her in her driveway. When they meet up in her minivan on the parking lot she is in full on panic mode. She wants to blow the whole deal off, but Rio is not having it. She’s not surprised. She is, however, very surprised at his solution to her Agent Turner predicament. “Aight, so tell ‘em I was hittin’ it,” he says, eyes dark, half smile playing around the corners of his very kissable mouth. Beth blushes furiously. The thought alone gets her ready to combust. “What?” she screeches. “Oh, I’m sorry sweetheart, tell ‘em we’re making love.” She gapes at him, unable to coherently communicate for a few seconds before stuttering, “How do I even say that?”

Just the mention of sex has her in knots, when he actually leans in she is done for. He reaches for her with his right hand and pulls her close. He caresses her cheek with his thumb, then he lets it slip forward and runs it across her bottom lip. Her eyes flick towards his face and she can see him working his lower lip with his teeth. A soft, longing sigh escapes her before she has any chance to reign it in. Their lips meet and what starts off as a relatively chaste touch soon turns into deep, messy kisses. The first time his tongue slides against hers she moans into his mouth loudly and when he actually has the nerve to chuckle she feels like digging a hole for herself. However, there is nothing she can do about it. She has no way of explaining his effect on her and however much her wanton body mortifies her by acting of its own accord she has no control whatsoever. 

He pulls back slightly and murmurs, “Tell ‘em, we met at a bar. You was pissed at your husband, ‘cause…” His voice trails off, willing her to fill in the gap.

“Because he’s been fucking his secretary,” she offers. 

He pulls back even further, frowning now. “For real?” he asks, looking her in the eyes. When she returns his look, she can see this is news for him. Besides surprise there is something else entirely in his eyes that she cannot quite put her finger on. She nods. He moves towards her again, kissing her again, hand wandering to her breasts, caressing one of her rock-hard nipples. “Stupid motherfucker. I knew he’s not trustworthy!”

“Well, I wish you had been there, when I married him, to tell me that,” she deadpans.

He nods his head towards the backseat. “Common,” he murmurs with a wicked grin. She is way past keeping up appearances and it takes her all of five seconds to get onto the backseat. As soon as he joins her, he snakes his arm around her and pulls her to him. He brings their lips together and kisses her hungrily. His hands wander to her blouse and start opening the buttons when he says, “So, you went to a bar, ‘cause you was angry at your punk-ass, motherfucker of a scumbag husband for stickin’ it to the secretary. We met and…”

“Had drinks?” she tries. His hands roam over her body, one is caressing her thigh beneath her skirt inching closer and closer to her center, while the other is lodged behind her back fiddling with her bra. When it finally opens he shoves the front of her bra upwards and sights appreciatively, “More beautiful than I ever could have imagined.” Then he starts starts kissing, nipping, biting her. Beth’s mind reels, has he just admitted that he has been fantasizing about her boobs? A complacent smile spreads on her face. He sucks one of her nipples into his mouth, successfully erasing any coherent thought from her brain when he bites it lightly before murmuring around it, “You took me home and we…”

“Had more drinks?” He huffs playfully. “Common, what I do, Mamma?”

“You,” she breaks off, too embarrassed to continue. But his hand, the one that has been caressing her thigh earlier, pulls her panties to the side and he dips his thumb between her lips circling her clit. She yelps. “Tell me, sweetheart,” he growls.

“You sit me on top of the kitchen island and pull off my panties,” she pants. He traces a trail of kisses from her left boob down over her stomach, nearing her throbbing center while he pulls down her panties just as she has described it seconds earlier. 

“Then?” he whispers.

“You kiss me.” And he does except he doesn’t kiss her mouth, but her lips down there where it really counts. She yelps again in surprise. Then moans loudly. She is lost in the sensation of his lips on her, his tongue on her clit. He breaks the contact for a second, placing one of his fingers at her entrance and whispers, ”Keep talking, Mamma!” As soon as she opens her mouth to speak, he lets first one then a second finger slide inside her, his mouth returns to the bundles of nerves, driving her to the edge.

“You push me back,” she moans. “You slide your hard, throbbing cock inside me.” She is about to come. “And you fuck me on the remnants of the kids breakfast dishes.” That is when she comes. Rio groans appreciatively when he feels her spasm around his fingers. She is boneless and disoriented. Did he just go down on her in her mamma van during the fucking afternoon? As soon as the thought materializes in her head, she pulls her blouse together in an attempt to cover herself from passers-by. 

He crawls up towards her and captures her lips into a slow and languid kiss. She can taste herself on his tongue and finds herself thinking, this must be the most erotic thing to ever happen to her. 

“What did the kids get for breakfast that morning?” comes his coy question. 

“I don’t know. Blueberry pancakes?” 

“Sounds delicious.”

She isn’t sure if he is talking about the pancakes or herself as he bucks his hips against her a few times letting her feel his hard bulge through the fabric of his jeans. “What about you?” she asks when he starts pulling back.

“I wish I could, but I have somewhere to be, sweetheart,” he says, his voice strained. Then he holds up her panties, his eyes sparkling, “But I’m gon’ keep these as a souvenir.” She tries to keep her laugh in but giggles anyway. He chuckles himself as he stuffs the panties into the pocket of his hoodie. He then climbs back towards the front seats and before he leaves the car, he turns around to look at her one last time and says, “Make me sound good, will you?” And he is gone. 

She lies in her car for a while. Unable to move and unable to comprehend what has just happened to her. Since their kiss she has of course been thinking about doing other things with him. But she would never have pictured it to happen this way, in her car, in fucking daylight. She giggles at her own adventurousness. Never would she have thought herself as the kind of woman to take such risks. But then again never has it felt anything like it does with Rio. But then an unwanted thought comes into her head. Had he only done this with her because he wanted her reactions to be genuine when she spoke to Agent Turner? Was he just using her to keep himself safe? Of course, she knows that nothing can ever come of their relationship. She is a housewife, he is a criminal. What was she expecting? That they were getting married? That they would be a family? 

“Unrealistic much?” she murmurs to herself. Hating how her chest feels constricted and her eyes sting.

She goes over their encounter again in her head. It might have started that way, as a joke even, when he realized how the bare mention of sleeping with him flustered her. But then when she had told him what Dean had done he had reacted genuinely surprised. And when she recalls his frown correctly he was angry even. Bewildered that Dean would do something so nasty. When he had seen her naked for the first time, he had called her beautiful. And she had heard the strain in his voice when he had to make his excuses. In fact, she had felt nothing but beautiful and wanted, while they’d been together. She decides to focus on that. Knowing all the while that she would get hurt in this relationship one way or the other. Be it because he is playing with her or because they cannot make it work due to their differences. However, she would still prefer the latter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.  
> If you have the time, let me know what you think.


	3. Sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another car, another first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More smut. I hope you enjoy.

The first time they have sex is when she brings him the money that bitch Mary Pat turned in without doing the actual shopping. They meet up at a secluded street, cars parked in opposite directions. He wants the name anyway but she isn’t giving it to him. Not when she knows where Mary Pat is coming from, however much she hates her for pulling this crap on her. Mary Pat’s situation is not unlike her own. Although, of course, Dean hasn’t died (yet?). When Beth is alone and brooding she sometimes thinks that Mary Pat is lucky. Her kids and even she herself will always be able to keep the memories of a good husband and father, whereas for her it feels as if she has wasted twenty years of her life on a scumbag, as Rio had so elegantly put it. Wasted was a bit of a hard word, though, Dean has given her four beautiful children after all. But still, when she leaves the kids aside and only thinks about herself and her needs, in terms of love and companionship, it feels as if she has given herself up to serve someone else. And someone who doesn’t even appreciate her. 

“Common, just give me a name,” he says after she has already refused him twice. 

“Beth Boland,” she answers evenly. He cannot suppress a chuckle and she can see something resembling respect in his eyes. 

“You’re a real piece of work, you know that, mamma?” He takes a step towards her, bringing up one hand behind her neck and pulling her close.

“Am I?” she asks, raising one eyebrow in challenge.

“Most certainly.”

“What are you going to do about it?”

He shrugs. ”Maybe this’ll work,” he purrs before lowering his lips onto hers. 

The moment they touch, she is on fire. All coherent thought is chased from her brain, hot desire pooling in her center. Her hands fly to his face, rubbing her thumbs against his usual stubble. She presses herself to him, wanton and shameless, but not caring. There is only one thing she cares about, after all the stolen kisses and that glorious encounter in her car the other week, and that is to get him inside of her.

“Can’t get enough of me, can you?” he chuckles breathlessly. “Wanna take this inside?” he adds, nodding towards his Cadillac. Due to her inability to form a straight sentence a simple nod has to do it.

He pulls her with him towards his car, opens the door and holds it open for her. She passes by him and scoots into the backseat of the Cadillac. She cannot help but appreciate the room they’ll have in here compared to her measly mamma-van. He joins her and closes the door behind him. The windows are toned and although it is pitch black outside it makes her way more comfortable to know that this time no one has the chance to catch a glimpse of them. 

He pulls her close and kisses her again. Soon his hands begin exploring her body. Her hat is the first piece of clothing that has to go but soon after her coat is gone as well and then her sweater. He sighs appreciatively when he lays eyes on her breasts that are barely contained in a black lacey bra. “So white,” he murmurs as he traces his fingers around her nipples. Her eyes drift shut at the sensation of his touch. He keeps undressing her and when he wants to pull down her panties, her eyes shoot open.

“What about you? Do you have somewhere to be again?” she asks, when she notices that he is still fully dressed. She props herself up on her elbows and pushes him back. He sits back, when she crawls towards him. She trails kisses from his mouth down his neck and when she comes up at his collar she starts to tug on his shirt and pulls it over his head. She resumes the kissing along his collarbone then down to his nipples and she is pleased by the gasp she elicits from him, when she gently bites down on one of them. She trails down even further and when she arrives there, she unbuckles his belt and gets to work on his fly and zipper. She feels intoxicated by the little moans he emits while she is kissing him all over. He lifts his hips to help her pull his pants down and then he makes to kick of his shoes in order to get the disruptive clothes off of his body. She sits back for a second taking in the sight of him. 

“I knew there were more,” she says with an appreciative glint in her eyes. Then she gasps. “is this…,” she trails off touching a small round patch of skin on his side devoid of ink. 

“Bullet,” he says, and gasps when she bends down to kiss it. She trails kisses from the gunshot wound to a second only about 4 inches lower. When she feels she has sufficiently explored his upper regions, she focuses on his cock running her lips softly over the velvety skin. He twitches so hard that his hips actually lift from the car seat. When she takes him into his mouth, his eyes roll back and he grinds out, “Shit, mamma!” She chuckles around him, sending the vibrations of her vocal chords straight to his cock. “Fuck, do that again,” he commands and she hums softly as she is working his penis with her mouth. She grabs his cock at the base now working the tip with her mouth while her hand slowly strokes the lower half. Lips sealed around the head she glances up at him and is surprised to see him staring down at her. “You’re so beautiful, Elizabeth,” he murmurs.

He lets her work on him for a couple of moments before he sits up and pushes her back onto the car seat. He crawls on top of her kissing her deeply, sliding one hand down her side towards her center. One finger dips between her lips and she groans loudly when it finds and circles her clit. After a few rounds the finger trails further down and pushes into her. A delighted sigh escapes him, when he feels just how turned on she is by him. “So wet,” he murmurs and kisses her again. 

His other hand wanders to the ashtray in the back of the middle armrest and opens it. She sneaks a peak and sees the ashtray is overflowing with small rectangular packages. 

“So, does this kind of thing often take place in the backseat of your car,” she asks unable to keep a hint of jealousy from her voice.

“Not as often as I’d like and never with women as beautiful as yourself,” he purrs. He rips open the small package with his teeth and wraps himself up. 

“Wanna do this, mamma?” he asks, positioning himself at her entrance. 

“God, will you just shut up and fuck me already?” she grinds out.

He chuckles as he pushes into her, but it’s not even a second until his chuckle morphs into a sound somewhere between pleasure and pain and his head falls forward onto her shoulder.

“See, that’s what you get for laughing...” but she trails off, when he starts moving inside her. 

He pulls out almost all the way, before pushing inside her again. She cannot remember anything ever feeling this good before. She has had her share of sex. She has four kids for crying out loud. But there is no way of knowing how many she would have had if it had ever been this good with Dean. It doesn’t take long until she feels her orgasm approaching. He can feel her twitching underneath him, no longer in control of her body. That is when he props himself up on his elbow to allow one of his hands to snake between them. She cries out when his thumb makes contact with her clit and he starts massaging it gently. Soon her moans and cries increase in volume and he picks up speed pumping in and out of her. When she clenches around him, his orgasm follows suit. She feels him pulsing inside of her as wave around wave crash upon her. 

He goes limb in her arms, nuzzling his head into the crook of her neck breathing her in. “I’d like to do that again sometime,” he murmurs with a contented sigh. 

She curls her arms around him, reaching for his neck tickling him lightly. They stay like this for a few minutes before he starts to stir. He props himself up onto his elbow and kisses her, then he begins to dress. 

When they’re both dressed they climb out of the car. He walks her over to her minivan and opens the door, but before she can climb in he says, “Let me give you some advice, yeah?” She nods. “When you got a rotten egg in the bunch, that stinks up the whole lot ‘til you get rid of it.”

She smiles at him, but stands her ground. “Like I said. I’m handling it.” She takes the driver’s seat of her car and shuts the door. Just as he is about to turn away from her, she lets the window roll down and adds, “And don’t ever point a gun at me again.” She lets the window roll up again and off she goes. She feels like such a badass right now, that she actually speeds a little on the way home. But just within reasonable limits, she doesn’t want to get pulled over for something as mundane as speeding when she is on her way to become a right crime queen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to keep uploading one chapter a day. 
> 
> The plot will definitely thicken soon and I cannot wait for your reactions.
> 
> If you have enjoyed reading the chapter, or if you haven't, I would appreciate your comments.


	4. Laugh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rio comes around hungry and in a bad mood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this was so much fun, I hope reading it is as well. Enjoy.

The first time they make each other belly laugh is when Dean is away on some business trip, buying a couple of cars. Or when he is screwing some other barely legal girl that she just hasn’t got wind of yet. Nor will she ever get wind of her, should she exist, because she doesn’t care to inquire. Considering Dean her mind is made up. Although they have been married for nearly twenty years, and although he has given her four beautiful babies, and despite the fact that he has cancer, she is not going to reconcile.

It’s not even about the secretary. When you are married for a long time, the relationship changes. It is hard to keep being attracted to the same person every day for twenty years. And, of course, the relationship becomes routine and somewhat boring at times. She has never believed the image created by romance novels or romantic comedies that couples would have the hots for each other for their entire lives. That is also why she’d much rather watch Real Housewives of Whatever than wasting her time on such nonsense. She knows there are such things as dry spells. That’s just normal. Especially, after giving birth to their fourth kid. 

She would have been able to live with him having a one-off with some client he has just sold a new car to. Or with an old classmate or a girl he has met at a bar. She would probably even be able to deal with multiple one-offs, but he has had an affair, that went on for quite some time. He has paraded this girl around on TV, rubbing it in, humiliating her publicly. And then he has managed to gamble away all of their money, putting their house, their future, their life at risk. This she couldn’t forgive. It isn’t about the money, though. When they first got married they hadn’t had a lot. But they managed to make it work. When his business began picking up, he was the one suggesting to buy such a large house. It is the betrayal that goes with leaving her in dark on just about anything.

And even that could have been forgiven, if he had come clean himself. But he hadn’t. She had to find out during her waxing appointment that she had taken only to get things going with him again. She had to endure the embarrassment of leaving there uneven because her credit card had been declined. After visiting that lingerie shop and seeing that outrageously expensive yet unfortunately tacky shred they sell to people as underwear, wrecking Dean’s home office had been more than a little satisfying. That was, of course, until she had found the papers. The papers that proved the extent of his betrayal. 

All of this is behind her now. At least that is what she likes to tell herself. It is certainly not that easy to get over a failing marriage. There are good and bad days. Today is a somewhat bad day, with half of her brood out of the house at sleepovers and the other half fast asleep upstairs, she feels lonely sitting on her couch by herself watching crappy reality TV. She has asked Annie and Ruby to join her, but Annie is pulling the graveyard shift at Fine and Frugal, as they are currently shut down for business, and Ruby is with Sarah who is getting sicker again. 

Now that Rio has taken all the counterfeit money from her various hiding spots, she also begins to worry again. Especially since he hasn’t been able to tell her when they would be back in business. Even though he had seemed calm during their conversation in the café, he had let her get a glimpse of the graveness of the situation when he told her just how much prison time he would have to expect, if he ever got caught. Now that not even their new business idea of distributing injectables has worked out, she mainly worries about two things. Firstly, she asks herself if she really is that bad at hiding things that he’s had no problems finding all of the fake cash. Secondly, she worries about being dependent on her side hustle to keep all this going. Her kids will have to deal with their parent’s divorce and their father’s illness soon, it would be cruel to also rid them of their home. Enough is changing already, she has to at least try to keep some things the way they are.

She leaves the back door unlocked most of the time now. Since she is already in cahoots with the local crime boss, she figures there’s not much worse out there. She also knows that a locked door wouldn’t keep him away anyway. Plus, she doesn’t have the money to repair a potentially broken door lock should he decide to break it in. Still, she jumps a little when she hears the back door open quietly and then shut again. But she regains her wits fast enough to say, “Is wine okay or do you need something stronger?”, before she even turns her head to look at him.  
“Stronger,” he answers. 

“Have a seat,” she says gesturing towards the sofa while she gets up and makes her way into the kitchen. Opening the liquor cabinet, that is technically the baking utensil cabinet, but since no one except herself ever looks into it, has been unofficially renamed. She takes out a bottle of bourbon and two glasses from the next cabinet and makes her way back to the sofa.

“So, how’s your associate doing?” she asks.

“Nah,” he says, “let’s not talk business.” He is in a foul mood. She can tell right away from the look on his face and the way he doesn’t make eye-contact with her.

“That bad, huh?”

He just shrugs. She hands him one of the glasses into which she has just poured a healthy amount of amber liquid and he drowns it quickly without even the hint of a flinch. Then he holds his glass up towards her, silently asking for a refill. She complies.

“Why are you here,” she asks, when he doesn’t say anything but just sits on her sofa quietly. 

“Dunno. Just stress relief, I guess.”

“Do you want to do it here or in the upstairs bedroom,” she drawls sardonically. 

“You have such a dirty mind,” he deadpans, chuckling to himself darkly.

“Excuse me? I have a dirty mind?” she acts heart-stricken. He smiles one of his half smiles at her. Apparently, his mood is beginning to lighten. 

“Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?” she asks, when he doesn’t answer.

“Well, you could always...” He points to his mouth and then to his pants and wriggles his eyebrows a little. 

She snorts. “Besides that?”

“Do you have any food in the house?” he asks, and his stomach growls as if to underline his point.

“I’ll see if I can whip something up for you. Wanna watch some bad reality TV while I’m slaving away?” She unpauses her program and makes her way into the kitchen. She looks into the fridge for inspiration on what she could possibly make him. On the one hand, she doesn’t want it to take long, because she wants to get back on that sofa with him. On the other hand, she wants it to turn out delicious. When her eyes skim over a plastic container at the very back of the fridge the idea hits her. She takes out all the ingredients and gets to work.

Fifteen minutes later she makes her way into the living room again, plate in her hand. 

“Why do you watch this crap?” he asks, when he hears her approaching.

“Movies are so unrealistic.”

“And this shit isn’t? You know reality TV is scripted, right?” he turns his head to look at her one eyebrow raised. “Oh, what’s that?”

She lowers the plate and hands it over to him. When he lays eyes on the blueberry pancakes he laughs out loudly. “Are you kidding me?” She has never really heard him laugh. She has seen his eyes sparkle with amusement, usually at something she’s said. He has chuckled once or twice in her presence, usually when she’s done or said something embarrassing. But she has never heard him full on belly laugh. She loves the sound of it. And it is contagious. She lets herself fall onto the couch next to him and laughs with him.

It takes Rio a minute before he is able to take a bite from his pancakes. When he tastes the first bite, he lets out a long appreciative groan, that is definitely borderline sexual. “These are seriously good,” he mumbles between a mouth full.

“I’m glad,” she answers.

“Oh Mamma, I’m seriously turned on right now!” Now it is her turn to burst out laughing. “This feels so weird. Being this turned on by food. How about that upstairs bedroom now?”

“Eat up,” she answers. “Those won’t be any good once they’re cold.”

He keeps eating, letting out these obscene groans that make her insides stir. The moment the last bite disappears into his mouth he shoves the plate away and crawls over to her. When he kisses her, she can still taste the pancakes on his tongue and they have really turned out delicious. He pulls her on top of him and when he bucks his hips at her she can feel that he is already hard. Apparently, he hasn’t been lying about the pancakes turning him on. She sits up straddling him and immediately his hands go up to her boobs. 

“Let’s go upstairs,” she says.

“Nah, I can’t,” he answers. “I must have you now.” He smiles at her suggestively.

“No, the kids, they can come down any minute. The bedroom has a door.”

She stands up and pulls him with her. They hurry up the stairs. She can hear his belt clattering behind her and she knows that he is already undressing. When they stumble through the bedroom door, his pants are around his ankles and his shirt is open. Her eyes linger on his deliciously hard penis for a second. She closes and locks the door before taking off her shirt and getting to work at her pants. When she looks up he is trying to get his pants, socks and shoes off at the same time. She laughs again. From the belly. The kind of laugh that lets her forget that she is broke, that lets her forget that they can never work out, that makes her giddy and contented at the same time. 

She pushes him onto the bed and then takes his shoes and pulls them off of him. Then his pants and boxers, meanwhile he gets rid of his shirt. When they are both naked she straddles him again. She takes his hard cock into her hand and lets herself sink onto it. He groans in pleasure as she begins riding him. His hands come up to her boobs again, caressing them, playing with her nipples. Then his hands wander down to her hips and he grips her hard, thrusting into her and it feels incredible. She moans loudly not able to keep the volume down as she loses herself in the sensation of his cock inside of her. They work up a steady rhythm and it doesn’t take long until she is getting closer. One of his hands wanders down to her clit and starts stroking it slowly. For a second, she wonders how he always manages to start touching her at the exact time she needs him to. When she looks down at him she can see his face scrunched up in something between pain and pleasure. His eyes are closed in concentration and he emits the most erotic moans and sighs while she is working on top of him. When he opens his eyes and sees her looking at him he picks up pace, thrusting into her with more vigor, until she cannot think but only feel. A few more thrusts and her orgasm comes crashing around her. She lets her head fall forward while he keeps up the pace, letting her ride out her pleasure. The sight turns him on to no end and soon his own movements become twitchy. When she is able to move again she adds an extra twist of the hips at every thrust that makes him grind out obscenities. She knows he doesn’t have long then and increases the pace even further. Suddenly he goes rigid as his orgasm hits him. “Oh god, Elizabeth,” he groans, his cock pulsing inside of her. She watches his face closely as he climaxes, wishing to remember how he looks at his most vulnerable. When he is spent, she lets herself fall forward towards him, capturing his lips into a sloppy, languid kiss.

“I like it, when you take charge,” he says sleepily before drifting off.

She gently gets off him in order not to wake him and then snuggles against him. Within seconds she drifts off as well.

A couple of hours later she is awakened by an insistent knocking. “Mum. MUM! I’ve had a bad dream.” It’s Emma. She is out of the bed within seconds, grabbing for the rope that hangs behind the door. Then she unlocks the door and lets herself out. Emma is in tears. She picks her up and carries her over to her bed.

“Tell me about your dream, honey,” she says in a soothing voice on their way over to Emma’s room. Emma proceeds to tell her about a monster under her bed. “Oh, honey, that sounds terrible. Let me get the flashlight, so I can check for monsters.” She opens the door to the closet in the hall and gets the flashlight. In Emma’s room she tucks the little one in and then uses the flashlight to look underneath the bed. “Nothing there, sweetheart. Let me check the closet.” She goes over to Emma’s closet and shines the light in there. “Nothing here, either.” She walks over to Emma and kisses her on the forehead. “How about I leave the hall light on, then you don’t have to be scared, alright?” Emma nods, already half asleep.

“I love you, sweety. Sleep tight.”

When she returns to the bedroom, Rio is awake, looking at her.

“You’re a good mother,” he says. It isn’t a compliment, just a statement of facts. 

“You should better go,” she replies softly.

“Wouldn’t know how to explain me to the kids.” There’s an edge to his voice that sounds surprisingly like hurt or longing or another such emotion, that is way too complicated to describe their relationship. 

She walks over to him, and lays a hand on his cheek, thumb stroking his stubble. She could just say Yes!, because how would she explain him to the kids. After all, they are just having a fling, aren’t they? But instead she says, “Kids are surprisingly resourceful when it comes to understanding the impossible. But that’s for another time.” A time for which she longs, but which just might never come.

He stands from the bed and takes her in his arms. “Thank you,” he says.

“For what?”

“For making me laugh. For making me forget. For being you.” Then he kisses her one last time before he dresses quickly and sneaks out of the house. She hears the back door close and closes her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, let me know what you think!


	5. Break Up

The first time they break up is the day she throws the keys into his face. 

“That family you’re always telling me about, go home to ‘em. What me and you had is done. Over.” 

He is livid and she can see it. Still she has several comebacks before he climbs the steps to the loading dock and tries to end their cooperation by saying, “Elizabeth, go home.” The use of her full name makes her lunge forward. It takes her about three seconds to catch up with him. She hauls herself at him and brings their lips together. Within seconds she is panting and moaning into his mouth. He deepens the kiss for an instant before pushing her away.

“No Mamma, we ain’t doin’ this tonight.” 

“Fine, have it your way, stupid ass!” she exclaims. 

He chuckles darkly before he grabs her and pulls her back towards himself. “Can you ever do what you’re told, darling?”   
She shakes her head. “I’m giving you an out”

“I don’t want out!”

“The keys you just threw in my face tell of a different story.” He is pissed and pulls her even closer to him. One hand twists itself in her hair and he pulls her head back again so that he can look into her eyes. “What you want, Mamma?”

“You! I want you.” It’s out there. She blushes furiously. His eyebrows knit together and he kisses her in earnest now. His arms circle her and he deepens the kiss even further. He pulls her with him as he makes a few steps backwards and opens the door into the warehouse. Like the last time she has been here, it is empty. He takes her by the hand and guides her into a small office. It feels a little bit as if they’re in a movie when he pushes everything off the big dark desk in one swift motion. It also turns her on quite a bit. Especially when his next move is to sit her on said desk and to start kissing her again. 

His kisses are different today. There is no playing around, no teasing, just deep, slow, sexy kisses. His hands are all over her and her hands likewise are all over him. He brushes her coat of her shoulders and snakes his hands beneath her T-shirt. They break their contact for a few seconds to get her shirt off. Both of them are breathing heavily. His hand reaches for her face and cups one of her cheeks. She leans into his tender touch and breathes a small contented sigh. His thumb brushes over her bottom lip before he engages her mouth into more of the same languid kisses. 

She fumbles with the buttons of his button-down, releasing one at a time. Soon the shirt falls and pools at their feet next to hers. She traces the designs of his patterned skin, following the lines of his tattoos. Her fingers wander lower and lower until she reaches the waistband of his pants. He hisses sharply when she runs her fingers along it. While she unbuckles his belt, he opens her bra and lets it slip to the floor. His mouth wanders from hers down her neck to her full breasts and he takes one of her hard nipples into it, swirling his tongue around it. She is lost in the sensation of his mouth on her. Her legs curl around him and pull him closer. He diverts his attention from her to the drawers of the desk, rummaging through them. In the third drawer, he finds what he is looking for and returns his attention to her with a small square package between his fingers.

She wants to yell out, God yes!, but there is something about this situation between them, that stops her. Rio is certainly not in the mood for talking tonight and she thinks it might be best to humor him. He shoves his pants down, Beth catches sight of that long, hard cock that makes her mouth water. Within seconds he wraps himself up, pushes her back and her skirt up, before hooking his thumb underneath her panties and pulling them to the side, placing himself at her entrance. Their eyes lock as he pushes himself inside of her and it is only towards the last inch that both their eyes slowly drift shut. He groans lowly, lets his head sink onto her shoulder and stills for a couple of seconds before starting to move. He slowly pulls out and pushes in again. The pleasure spikes inside of her, so much so that she can see stars exploding before her eyelids. They find a slow and sensual rhythm, kissing all the while. One of his hands makes its way up towards her face and again he caresses her cheeks, her hair, jaw line, and kisses her tenderly. Suddenly it hits her. This is goodbye. He is bidding her farewell. Memorizing how she feels against his hands, his mouth, his cock. She has to blink back tears at this realization. The point in time that she has been afraid of for a while now has finally arrived. There would be time to cry later, she thought. Now was the time to burn him into her memory. Her hands fly to his face and start a similar exploration of his features. All the while her legs desperately try to pull him closer to her. And now she even hears it. His moans and gasps and growls sound like pure agony mixed with only a hint of pleasure. 

The pressure is building between them and soon all coherent thought is erased from her brain. She arches her back as she feels her impending orgasm. It takes two long and delicious thrusts to send her over the edge and as she contracts around him, he goes as well. He buries his face in the hollow between her neck and shoulder, catching his breath, breathing her in. As soon as the fog begins to lift from her brain, realization hits her that this has just been the last time they would ever do this. Her chest constricts when he starts to stir. She pulls him to herself not wanting to let go just yet. And he humors her for a few seconds before he props himself up on his elbows and kisses her. 

When he pulls out of her she whimpers at the feeling of loss that sparks inside her. He pulls up his pants, buckles his belt and grabs for their discarded shirts. He hands her bra over to her while slipping into his shirt. When she has put on her bra again he helps her into her shirt, in the same tender manner that she helps her kids dress in the morning. She returns the favor by buttoning his shirt again while he sorts out her hair. He helps her off the table and straightens her skirt before he helps her to shrug into her coat. He pulls her to himself, runs his hand through her hair and when she looks into his eyes she sees sadness beneath his carefully schooled mask of indifference. 

That is when she knows. This isn’t just goodbye, like let’s break up, see you never. This was goodbye, like goodbye for good, like goodbye from this world. Panic shoots through her. Would he do it now? Or would he let her see her family one last time? Would he be the one to do it? Or would he send one of his goons? Would it hurt? Tears rush to her face, she cannot keep from shaking. She bites her lip hard enough to draw blood to keep the tears from spilling as she walks out of the room. And as if she’s had any doubts left, his soft “Goodbye, Elizabeth.”, wipes all of them away.

She practically runs to her car. Desperate to get as much space in between them as she can. Desperate to make it home before he decides to send a hitman after her. Desperate to see the sleeping forms of her babies just one last time. But the hit doesn’t come this night. Nor the next morning. That is when she calls up Annie and Ruby to find a way to put him somewhere, where he cannot hurt her or her family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. I'd love to hear what you think!


	6. Fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My take on what happens after the finale.
> 
> I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to leave me kudos or comments. They are all very much appreciated.
> 
> Warning: Lot's of dialogue this time.

The first time they really fight is obviously after he returns from being taken in by the Feds. When she returns home, she is greeted by a familiar voice. “Hey Honey, we’re home.” She stops dead in her tracks. Panic melts her to the spot for a few seconds before she is able to move her feet. She lets her bag fall to the floor and walks towards the kitchen. Her heart races and her ears because apart from her own heartbeat she can suddenly hear the swoosh of the ocean. Tears well up in her eyes and she doesn’t even attempt to keep them from spilling.

“Would have been here sooner, but I got tied up,” he says in a lazy voice.

When she rounds the corner, she can see him lounging casually in one of the chairs of her dining room table. One arm lazily draped around Dean’s shoulders. Dean who has been beaten to a bloody pulp. Too weak to even keep his own head up. She can hear him breathing heavily through his swollen nose. 

“Surpriiiise,” he drawls.

When she looks over at Rio, she concludes that Dean must have put up a real fight, that he must have gotten in a few good licks himself. Because even though Rio doesn’t look half as bad as Dean does, he still looks pretty banged up. He rubs his chin with his left hand, which might be one of his carefully schooled gestures of indifference, or it could be him rubbing his aching, beaten up face. For the flash of a second she thinks that he still looks beautiful, even now that he has taken a couple of punches when he came to her house to kill her. Something is seriously wrong with her. No sane person would ever marvel at the beauty of their killer just seconds before it is about to happen.

Dean raises his head as far as he can to look at her. “I’m sorry, Beth.”

“He didn’t do anything,” she says ignoring Dean, addressing Rio instead.

“Oh, he tried,” he says chuckling, shaking Dean in the process. “He tried. Got more fight in him than I thought. Isn’t that right, champ.” He slaps him in the face, humiliating Dean even further. She flinches.

“I’m sorry. Does this...,” he begins, eyes flicking up towards Beth, putting Dean in a headlock. “Does this bother you?”   
Tears streaming down her face, she says, “Let him go.”

“What? You can’t even handle a little blood?” He’s mocking her. He looks up, eyes locking with hers and says, “I thought you wanted to be me? I mean, that’s what all this is, right? You tryin’ to put me away and all. You must have big plans. But see, you didn’t think things all the way through. It takes balls to do what I do. You wanna be the king, you gotta kill the king. This stuff is medieval, darling.”

She cannot keep her calm any longer. The sob that has been threatening to escape finally makes it out of her throat together with a rush of words. “Please, don’t do this! Please, don’t kill us!”

He laughs. A twisted parody of the beautiful sound she has heard mere meters away from where she is standing now, when she made him pancakes. “I ain’t gonna kill nobody!” The laughter dies on his face. “Nah, man. You are!” That’s when he releases the safety catch of his gold-plated gun and slides it across the table towards her.

Her eyes shoot back and forth between him and the gun a couple of times before she lunges forward, to get the gun into her hands, then takes a couple of steps backwards and points it at him. If he is scared he doesn’t show it. All he does is casually lean back in his chair, giving Dean a short side glance.

“Now sweetheart, let’s see if you’ve got what it takes.” Then he fixes her with an intense stare.

She doesn’t know what to do. She doesn’t want to shoot him any more than she wants to shoot Dean.

“Go ahead, who’s it gonna be?” he asks.

After a few seconds she figures that she should at least get Dean out of here.

“Dean. Go. Now!” she commands. She knows that Dean isn’t the brightest, but when he says “Where?”, she is ready to punch him herself.

“Wherever! Just go!” He scrambles to his feet and makes for the door. Rio lets him go without protest, watching the scene unfold in front of himself with interest. Before Dean opens the door, he stills and says, “What about you?”

“I have brought this upon myself. I will handle it. Now GO,” she snaps at him. “Take care of my babies,” she adds. She flinches when she hears the door fall shut. She lets one last sob escape her throat, when she hears the tires of Dean’s car squeal as he speeds off a couple of seconds later. Now that she knows her babies will be fine, now that their father is on his ways to them, she can pull herself together enough to handle her execution. A sense of calm settles over her.

She sits down at the table opposite of Rio who is still looking at her intently. In the back of her mind she remembers a day trip she took with her dad once. They went to a friend’s farm. She had just turned 18 and brought Dean home for the first time to meet her parents. Her father took her shooting. Subtle had never been his strong suit. But she remembers now, how he had shown her how to work a gun. She looks at the gun and even though it looks different than the one her father has taught her on, she thinks she can disassemble it into its components. It takes her a little longer than it should, but when she is finished, she finally looks up at Rio again.

“Where do you want to do this? Here or do you want to go somewhere? My car is right outside,” she says more calmly than she feels.

“Let’s go then,” he answers. He stands, takes the different parts of his disassembled gun and puts them into his pockets. “You drive.”

While they pull out onto the street he starts reassembling the gun, but when he is finished he doesn’t point it at her. The drive seems to take forever. She would have thought, that with her live almost over, minutes would tick away like seconds but the opposite was the case. Although she has lived in Detroit her whole life, she doesn’t know where they are heading. She doesn’t recognize any of the streets and the road signs don’t help her orientation either.

After what feels like forever they pull up in front of a warehouse.

“Is this...?” she trails off.

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t we take the direct route?”

“Driving calms me down. I really needed to calm down.” What is that supposed to mean? But Beth doesn’t get the chance to think about it, because he makes his way out of the car. She follows suit. They go into the warehouse, which again is empty. He leads her into the office, which has been tidied up since her last visit. He makes his way towards the desk, and for a brief second of insanity she believes that he is going to wipe it clean just like last time. But all he does is roll the chair over to her with a kick of his foot and then sit down on top of the desk. She complies to his unspoken command to sit down on the chair.

“What is going to happen now?” she asks.

“I’m not going to kill you, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Her eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Relief floods her system. “Why?”

“I just can’t.”

“Why?”

He doesn’t answer. Instead he starts questioning her. “Why did you do that?”

“I was trying to protect my family.” She looks into his eyes and can see genuine surprise there.

“From what?”

“You.”

“Me?” His face is slack with astonishment. Can she have misread him this severely?

“You wanted to kill me. Us,” she stands her ground.

“And you figured that out... how exactly?” 

“You looked at me funny.” Her voice has become quiet. Now that he looks at her with such bewilderment, she begins to feel stupid. 

“I did what exactly?” She can hear him getting angry again.

“You looked at me funny, like you wanted to kill me.”

“How exactly does one look, when they want to kill you? Can you please explain that?” He begins to shout, jumping off of the desk and starting to pace in front of it. 

“Well, the way you looked at me. That night. Here,” she whispers. She looks around the room. Doing everything she can to avoid his eyes. Now that it seems that he doesn’t want to kill her she feels stupider by the minute.

“How exactly did I look?” he shouts. She doesn’t respond. “Common,” he shouts again. “How did I look? What made you so sure I wanted to kill you? Tell me, Elizabeth.”

Again, it is the use of her given name that drives her into action. “It felt like you were saying goodbye. You seemed so determined, but also kind of beaten up about it, so I thought that was because you were going to kill me!”

“You’re one crazy bitch!”

“Am I?” she whispers again.

“Yes, you are!” He runs his hands over his head, through his short hair. “I was giving you an out! I was breaking things off between us,” he yells.

“Don’t give me this shit. You didn’t look at me like you were breaking things off. You looked genuinely...,” she fumbles for words for a second, “like..., I don’t know, ... sad!” 

“Ever occur to you, that I might actually have been genuinely sad?” Now he is the one whispering.

“What? Why?” She’s incredulous.

“Are you honestly telling me, that it hasn’t occurred to you that I might actually like you enough to feel sad when I had to break things off?” 

“No,” she says in a small voice, looking at her knees. Tears started to collect in her eyes again. How could she have misread him this badly? How could she have missed that he wasn’t only fucking her, but that he apparently really liked her? But then doubt begins to stir inside her. Why would he feel anything for her? She was just a stupid housewife, concerning herself with cooking, cleaning, car pool and PTA meetings. What was attractive about that?

“I should’ve beaten that motherfucker to death,” he growls.

“I... what? Dean? Why?” she is confused.

“Honey, it’s never occurred to me that you are this dense.” He stares at her angrily. 

“You’re just not making a lot of sense right now,” she feels her courage seeping back, although she isn't sure it is the best tactic to talk back at him. He still has that gun in his pocket and if she irritates him enough he might still use it.

“You have no idea,” he looks at her as though wondering about something.

“Of what?”

“Of the fact that you’re beautiful, and funny, and hot as hell. And you don’t even have the slightest clue because that scumbag treated you like you were ordinary.” He shakes his head sadly. 

“Oh,” is all she manages. He is right, though. She doesn’t feel beautiful. She was getting old, she counted the crow’s feet at the corners of her eyes every morning. Her body was ruined after four kids. And funny? Annie has always been the funny one, not her. When he calls her hot, she just doesn’t see it.

“You’re doin’ it,” he says. Her head shoots up towards him, eyebrows raised in confusion. “You’re questioning what I’ve just said in your head.” He stands and walks over to her. Never breaking eye-contact. A single tear escapes her left eye and he brings his hand up and brushes it away. She leans into his touch. Savoring it, because for the life of her she cannot believe that they can ever come back from this.

When he speaks again, his voice is soft and his eyes never leave hers. “If you was my wife, I’d never hurt you. I’d never stop wanting you, no matter how many kids you’d pop out. I’d probably not even be able to make it out of the house like ever, because I needed to fuck you so badly.”

Her answering smile is weak. More tears roll down her cheeks as she imagines what a life with him could have been like. But that is unrealistic, an unwanted voice says in her head, he is a criminal. They could never have a life together.

“How did you manage to get released? Or did you bolt?” she asks, changing the topic. She still doesn’t understand the whole story.

“I was released,” he says.

“How?”

“When you’re this far up, there are others who take the fall for you.” She doesn’t understand and it seems to show on her face, because he continues, “Let’s just say, there are four very angry wives and a couple of children that I will have to take care of for a very long time.”

“But why did you even get taken in when they didn’t have anything on you?”

“Agent Turner knows who I am, of course. But he cannot prove shit. He took me in, held me for 48 hours and then had to let me go.”

“And then... ,” she trails off.

“Then I went to your house, because it must have been you, and I run into that goof that you call a husband. And he is in my face, calling me bounce-house-guy, yelling at me, how I have taken advantage of you, like you’re some dumb bitch with the IQ of an eight-year-old. I just lost it.”

She was speechless. After all she has done to him in the last 36 hours it has been Dean’s underestimation of her mental faculties that tipped Rio over the edge. She cannot help but think that maybe Rio is the one who has gotten it wrong. How could she call herself smart or intelligent or wise, when she has fucked up this royally? Right now, she feels like the dumbest, stupidest bitch to ever walk the earth.

“I’m sorry,” she whispers.

“Well honey, too little, too late.”

She nods. “This means we’re... ,” she trails off again, unable to form the words.

“Over? Yes darlin’, we’re so over!” he replies without heat. New tears burn in her eyes as she stands up from her chair and walks over to the door. With her hand on the handle, she stills and says, “When there is ever anything I can do for the four very angry wives and their children, let me know. I know my way around a house and kids. And if they’d ever let me, I’d like to apologize to them in person.” She twists the door knob and makes her way to the car.

She cries during the entire drive home, but when she finally arrives she has calmed enough to phone Dean. When she takes her cell out she counts as many 16 unanswered calls and several messages inquiring about her well-being.

She dials his number, Dean picks up on the second ring. 

“Beth? Are you okay?” He is frantic with worry.

“I’m fine,” she says. He starts babbling, shooting off questions, talking about calling the police.

“Dean, stop,” she says calmly. She is glad that he actually listens to her for once and that she doesn’t have to shout.   
“Rio is not going to be a problem anymore. Just as long as we don’t create problems for him. That means, this night has never happened.” She then proceeds to tell him everything. From the first time they robbed Fine and Frugal to the stolen kisses, their encounter in the car, blueberry pancakes and how she had believed Rio was out to kill her and they robbed Fine and Frugal a second time to get him arrested. She tells him everything that has happened after his departure. When she is finished they are quiet for a few seconds. 

“What now?” he asks.

“I don’t know. I will have to get a job. Enough is changing already, I don’t want the kids to lose their home.”

“You know, if you gave our marriage another shot, you wouldn’t have that problem.”

“No Dean, that’s really not going to happen.”

“But Beth, why?”

“Are you joking? You pretended to have cancer!”

“Yes, well, that wasn’t my brightest moment.”

“No, it definitely wasn’t. But Rio said something to me tonight that really got to me.”

“What did he say?”

“He said, I was so convinced that he could never find me attractive that I couldn’t believe that he was sad when he tried to give me an out. I don’t want to blame you for my lack of self-esteem entirely, but getting back together is not going to do me any good. I need to be on my own for a while. I need to get to know myself again.”

“I’m stupid like that,” he begins, “All my friends have always been reminding me about my hot wife and how jealous they were. But it wasn’t enough for me. Now I could kick myself for how stupid I was.”

“Must be the quarterback in you,” she jokes lightly.

“I’m sorry,” he says sadly.

“Don’t worry. I will never keep you away from the kids. They love you and for all your faults, you’re still a really good dad.”

They talk a little more. Then she goes to bed, trying to catch some sleep before she has to pick up the kids in the morning.


	7. Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rio returns after the warehouse.

The first time he returns after their fight is two months later. Everything is slowly coming together for Beth. The kids have accepted that their parents aren’t going to be living together anymore. They still cry a lot though. But Beth and Dean work together to make it as easy on them as possible. Dean has rented a flat near the house, so that the children can go over to his flat at any time without it being a big effort. Kenny often has his lunch at the house and then walks over to Dean’s to do his homework on the days that Dean has the afternoon off. He takes the afternoon off more often now to spend time with his children. In a way he is an even better father now. On the weekends they sometimes take the children out together. Last weekend they all went to an indoor playground together and there was only a little crying when Dean didn’t go home with them.

She has also found a job at a florist, that is not far from the house, helping out with the bookkeeping. Every day after dropping the children off at school she drives over to the shop and works a half day before picking the children up again. When they arrive home, she heats the lunch she has prepared the prior evening and then helps them with their homework, drives them to soccer practice and does the housework. After dinner the kids get an hour of TV time before they have to be off to bed. She uses this hour to prepare lunch for the next day. When the children are asleep at last, she usually is exhausted. She slumps on the couch, watching some TV. On a good night she has a glass of wine, on a bad night she has a glass of bourbon. 

Sometimes Beth sees the odd dark vehicle parked on the street before the house and finds herself whishing it to be Rio looking out for her. But these cars either belong to her neighbors or vanish before she can determine ownership. So, she just tries to forget about them.

On the weekends Annie and Ruby sometimes come over and they pull one of their reality TV nights. But all of them are having a hard time. Ruby and Stan are barely speaking after Stan has found out about Fine and Frugal the Second. Annie is still struggling to adjust to Sadie’s new living situation, missing her dearly. All of them are slaving away. Ruby is pulling double shifts at Dandy Donuts, Annie is now a regular at the graveyard shift at Fine and Frugal. All of them are exhausted, but they try their best to keep the mood light. At least they have each other, and after what they have been through they don’t take that for granted. 

Today has been especially hard for Beth. Emma starts to cry during breakfast demanding for her father. She isn’t able to calm her down and has to call Dean, feeling like a complete failure. Dean is already at work, but comes anyway. It takes him all of twenty seconds to calm Emma down and then he loads all of the children into his car and drives them to school. Beth is left behind, crying. When she is finally able to stop, she is already half an hour late for work. Model employee that she tries to be, she works half an hour longer than she usually would and rushes to get to her kids. Kenny is pissed off, because he has gotten scared that his parents might have forgotten about him, and throws a tantrum to cover up. Beth, of course, sees right through him, feeling ashamed to fail him yet again. The boys have soccer practice that afternoon and the girls want to head over to Sadie’s, so Beth spends one and a half hour driving them around town. When she finally arrives home and wants to start on tomorrow’s lunch, she manages to smash a glass of mixed pickles in the fridge, leaving her to take everything out and clean the whole thing top to bottom. She barely manages to pick the boys up on time and brings them home. She sits them in front of the TV and calls up Gregg and asks him if he can bring the girls over later. She is beyond grateful that she can save herself the trip. When the children are finally asleep she puts on her pajamas and a ridiculously violent action movie and sits down with a glass of bourbon in hand, the bottle resting next to her against the backrest, as if watching the movie with her.

During an especially ridiculous explosion, she hears the back door open and close again. She doesn’t react. Dean has gotten used to the fact that she still doesn’t lock up and uses the door sometimes to come over. She is in no mood to talk to him. He hasn’t quite accepted her choice to separate yet. Sometimes when he feels lonely at nights, he comes over. 

Most of the time he just wants to talk, and she is fine with that. Sometimes, however, he is drunk. That’s when he wants to fight. Either way she is in no mood. She is determined to get just the right shade of drunk. Enough so that she falls asleep as soon as her head hits the pillow, but not so drunk that she is going to have a headache tomorrow. 

“Go home,” she says. “I’m not in the mood!”

“You on a date?” asks a different voice than she’s expected. Her head lashes around. It’s not Dean standing in her house, but Rio.

“What?” she manages.

“Looks like you and Jim over there are getting quite cozy.” Is he mocking her?

“I... ,” she looks at the bottle, then back at him. “Don’t mock me!”

He walks over to the couch and sits next to her. “You look exhausted,” he says, looking at her concerned.

“Turns out, going legit doesn’t pay as well as laundering money,” she jokes bitterly.

“I wouldn’t know anything about that,” he answers, he tries to keep the mood light.

“What are you doing here, Rio?” she asks flatly. She is in no mood to beat around the bush.

He doesn’t answer right away, but looks at his hands instead.

“Want a drink?” He nods, and she gets up and walks into the kitchen to retrieve a glass for him. When she returns to the living room she pours a generous amount of amber liquid into his glass and hands it over to him. 

He takes a sip and flinches. “That’s gross.”

“Money’s tight,” she explains. He sips again anyway.

“Running the risk of repeating myself, but what are you doing here, Rio?” 

“I... I don’t... ,” he stutters. “I don’t know how to do this.” He looks at her helplessly.

“Let me rephrase the question then. What do you want, Rio?”

“You. I want you,” he repeats the same word she has said to him the night he has broken up with her. The significance of the words isn’t lost on her. In fact, her hand moves of its own accord to put the glass onto the coffee table. He mirrors her movements with his own glass. When she sits the glass down it slides right of the table and shatters into a million pieces. But she doesn’t notice. She just reaches out one hand towards his face and the instant her fingertips touch his face, he is on her. Suddenly their lips meet and she is hit by a wave of emotion that leaves her head spinning. Before she has the opportunity to process what is happening his tongue is in her mouth and her pajamas are being ripped open. She is caught up in a vortex of feelings that threaten to consume her. She doesn’t know what to do with her hands while he is already pushing her pants down to bury one hand between her legs. When he pushes two fingers inside of her she is already dripping and he groans appreciatively, but she can detect the longing in it and feels it just as badly in her heart. Finally, she brings her hands towards his hoodie and she pulls the zipper down, pushing it off of his shoulders. She pulls on his shirt trying to push it up, desperate for the feel of his skin against hers. They break apart for a few seconds and both get rid of their clothes. Rio pulls a small package out of the front pocket of his jeans, and is already wrapping himself up, when Beth lowers herself onto the sofa again. Within seconds he is inside of her and it only takes two deliciously long thrusts before her orgasms hits her hard. “Oh god, Rio,” she sighs as he is moving in and out of her quickly while she is pulsing around him. He kisses her sloppily, one hand in her hair, pulling her head into a position to grant him easy access to her mouth. With the other hand he holds her face. She leans into the touch she has so dearly missed during their time apart. As he is nearing the edge he picks up pace and moves his hand out of her hair towards her clit, starting to circle it. She would have thought it impossible but his gentle touch in combination with his vicious pace of thrusting into her brings her close again. When his orgasm rips though him and he buries himself in her as deeply as he can, it only takes one last flick of his thumb until she comes again.

It doesn’t take long before he begins to stir. He discards the condom and begins to dress. One look into his face tells her that his defenses are up again. He doesn’t look her in the eye when he slumps back into the couch. 

“We shouldn’t have done that,” he says flatly. The words cut into her like a knife. She scrambles to find her pajamas and puts them on as quickly as she can. Tears stinging in her eyes. She bites down on her bottom lip, willing the tears not to spill and whispers, “Please go.” And he does.

When he is gone she quickly fetches a broom, to clear away the mess of her shattered glass, before she goes upstairs and cries herself to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Please, leave a comment if you have enjoyed the chapter.


	8. Talk

The first time they talk after their fight is a week later. Beth is a mess. When he had come back into her house a week ago and they had been at it within five minutes, she had let herself think that they would reconcile. She had believed that he was just as miserable as she was. But she had been sadly mistaken. She had interpreted emotions into his actions that obviously hadn’t been there. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been able to leave her the way he did. For days now, she has been feeling like a car wreck. When she is alone she cries all the time, but even when she isn’t alone she bursts into tears at inappropriate times. She snaps at the children, she drinks too much and she generally feels exhausted. And she is seething. How dare that stupid asshole come into her house, fuck her and then tell her that they shouldn’t have done that. 

She accepts her share of the blame for this situation. It is her fault that he’s tried to cut her out of his life. But this particular mess was on him. She hadn’t done anything that night. She had left him alone just the way he wanted her to. But he decided to return to her house. He decided to fuck her. And she doesn’t believe for one second that he came for anything else. He even had a condom with him. That is how cocksure he had been that he was going to get some.

Two days after his visit the girls come over and they immediately see that something is off with her. Ruby is the first to arrive. Beth has already started on the booze and before she is even able to switch the TV on, she is in tears. When Annie arrives, Beth is in Ruby’s arms.

“What is going on?” Annie asks apprehensively. Ruby mouths 'I don’t know' towards her. 

“Hey, Sis,” Annie coos, stepping towards the other two women, gently rubbing Beth’s back. She steps away from Annie and Ruby and goes towards the kitchen counter. She unscrews the bottle of bourbon that sits there and takes a generous sip right from the bottle.

“It’s that bad?” Annie asks. Beth nods. “Well, you will be glad to know that I brought two bottles of the good stuff.” She reaches into her bag and pulls out two bottles of Beth’s favorite bourbon. Beth sighs contentedly and grabs for one of the bottles. 

“I swiped them from work. Told Boomer that two bottles broke,” she says with a triumphant grin. Beth contemplates dumping the cheap liquor into the kitchen sink, but the way her bank account looks these days, she figures that she will be glad for it to be there in two days’ time.

“Spill, Sis,” Annie says. Now Beth will have to pay the price for keeping everything Rio-related from the girls. As far as they are concerned, Rio has reconsidered killing them because she had begged him on her knees to think about the seven children whose childhoods he would destroy should he lay a hand on any of them. The story was so thin that she had been surprised that the girls had bought it. They were probably just too happy that the immediate threat was averted from them to ask any questions. 

“It’s Rio,” Beth says in a small voice and just as she is about to close her mouth a sob escapes her.

“Is that motherfucker threatening to kill us again?” Ruby screeches. Beth shakes her head vigorously.

“No! No, he isn’t. No need to worry,” Beth begins, quickly ensuring them that they aren’t in any danger. “The story I told you, why he didn’t have us killed, wasn’t entirely true.” She tips her gaze down too embarrassed to look her two closest friends in the eye after she has lied to them for months.

“Yeah,” both of them say in unison and Ruby adds, “We figured as much. The explanation you gave us was a bit on the thin side to be honest.” Beth’s head shoots upwards, looking at her two best friends consecutively. 

“I’m sorry, I just couldn’t bring myself to tell you the whole story.”

“That’s basically what we thought. I wanted to confront you, but Ruby here said to leave you alone and that you would tell us as soon as you’re ready.”

When they both shrug, Beth cannot keep a laugh from bubbling out of her. She loves these two crazy ladies to pieces. Only they would take her flimsy story without complaint and wait until she is ready to spill. That is when she starts to tell them from Fine and Frugal the First to the aftermath of Fine and Frugal the Second. While telling the girls everything, she goes through an entire box of Kleenex and when she has finally finished she is a blubbering mess. 

“Wow!” Ruby says and they sit quietly for some time. Annie pours a new round of drinks for them.

“You really screwed that up, huh Sis?” she says in an awkward attempt to break the silence.

“No shit,” Beth says and chuckles darkly.

“Maybe he just needs more time,” Ruby tries.

“No, I don’t believe that.” Beth answers.

“I’m not saying that this wasn’t a dick move, but Ruby might have a point here...”

“Bullshit,” Beth interrupts her sister.

“No, hear me out before you call bullshit.” Annie takes a sip from her glass. “You’ve really hurt him...”

“Yes, we have established that I have screwed this up. Thank you, Annie,” Beth huffs.

“If you would just let me finish, for fuck’s sake!” She shoves Beth lightly. “He’s had a point when he said that you didn’t know your own worth. That’s part of the reason I’ve never liked Dean particularly.”

“Word,” Ruby interjects.

“You were so sure that he was only fucking you, because he got a kick out of screwing a Stepfort mum, that you’ve never even for a second considered the other possibility that he might actually like you. And when he tried to do the selfless thing and offered you an out, you tried to bring him down. That must have really hurt. Maybe he really just needs some time to get the, you know, bigger picture.” She air quotes her last words. 

“Exactly,” Ruby says, “He’s come back once. Maybe he’ll come back again.”

Beth isn’t convinced yet. Still her mood lightens after their talk. Just before they retire to the couch to start their weekly viewing of The Real Housewives, Annie says, “I can’t believe that I accused you of having dried up twigs down there, when all the while you’ve had the juiciest sex of all of us.”

Beth bursts out laughing and for a few hours she can forget how miserable she is and just enjoy the company of her two closest friends. 

Her girl’s night really brightens her up for the next two days. That is until she has lunch with her boss at the local Greasy Spoon, a restaurant called La Laterna that is at the same time acclaimed and feared by the locals. Although, serving the best pizzas in town, the restaurant has the reputation of being not particularly clean. That is why the general advice when eating there is to never eat anything that hasn’t stayed in the oven for at least ten minutes. Beth, as a long-time customer, has of course abided by the rule. Still around early evening the puking begins and she is miserable once again.

Dean takes the kids off of her hands and she spends the next days in her pajamas puking her guts out hourly. Ruby brings by some soup and crackers for her one afternoon, but is quick to excuse herself in an attempt to keep herself and her family healthy. Annie drops by an hour later with a surgical mask put on.

“Very funny,” Beth manages from the downstairs bathroom in between heaves.

When she returns to the kitchen to see what Annie has left for her, she finds Gregg’s Netflix password. Although, her skepticism towards movies persists she gives it a go. Two hours later she is deep into her second romantic comedy, sobbing into a fistful of Kleenex. She is practically wailing when she suddenly hears a voice behind her.

“Wow, you look even worse than last week!”

She jumps from the sofa in surprise, her hands shoot towards her hair, aiming for damage control. 

“That’s not going to cut it, sweetheart,” he drawls lazily with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

“What do you care?” she huffs. 

“I don’t. Looks cute, though,” he says, keeping his tone light.

“I’m really not in the mood, Rio,” she says. “And you would be better off keeping your distance. I’ve been puking my guts out for days. You wouldn’t want to catch that.” Right on cue her stomach lurches and she has to run to make it to the bathroom in time. She hopes against hope that Rio will just leave the house, but she is not surprised when he pokes his head into the bathroom.

“You okay, mamma?” he asks. It stings to hear him casually call her by the nickname that he has spoken with such tenderness before.

“I’ll be fine,” she gurgles with as much dignity as she can muster, before dry retching above the toilet.

He comes in and rummages through the cabinets. For a second, she thinks he is going after narcotics, but probably even he knows that the strongest he will be able to find is baby aspirin. He finds a washcloth and wets it underneath the faucet. He wrings it out and makes his way towards her, bringing the blissfully cold cloth to her forehead. He wipes the sweat from her face before folding the cloth in half and laying it onto the back of her neck.

“Better?” She gives a contented sigh. “Can you move?” She groans. He chuckles a little to himself, before leaving the room. She barely even notices. She is beyond exhausted. With her hourly trips to the bathroom, her two-hour crying-session hasn’t done anything to refresh her. She feels gross and just so tired. With her head on the toilet seat, she lets her eyes drift shut and she has either drifted off for a few minutes or Rio is back super quickly.

“Can you stand, mamma?” he asks softly.

“No! I’m gonna hurl again.” That’s when he picks her up, making her cry out in surprise. She chooses not to fight him, but hides her face in the crook of his neck instead. She breathes in his familiar scent, when he kisses her head on their way upstairs. He walks her through the bedroom straight into the bathroom beneath and sits her down on the edge of the tub. He strips her of her pajamas and helps her into the tub, where heavenly hot water awaits her. Her tight muscles begin to relax and for the first time in three days she doesn’t feel like she might hurl any minute. He leaves the bathroom again and lets her soak for a few minutes. When he returns he has a bowl of Ruby’s soup in one hand and a packet of crackers in the other. She groans at the sight of him. The smell of food makes her queasy again.

“Believe me, sometimes a little food can settle the stomach.” When he begins to spoon feed her, she tries to dodge the spoon until he says, “Common mamma, give it a try.” She complies then and is surprised that her body doesn’t reject the food. She can feel the hot soup making its way down into her stomach and the nausea lifts slightly. When he has fed her half the bowl and she is feeling better than in days, he moves it to the side. “Hands,” he commands and when she reaches them up, out of the water, he takes a towel and dries them, before putting a cracker in one of them. Then he sits down at wall opposite the tub.

“What are you doing here, Rio,” she asks looking at him intently, nibbling at her cracker.

“Helping you out.” He chooses to answer the question directly, ignoring the real meaning of it.

“You know this isn’t what I’ve meant.”

He nods, then says, “I don’t know.”

She snorts indignantly. “Last week, I might have believed you.”

When he looks up into her eyes, he can see the hurt there and he has the grace to avert his eyes ruefully. “I couldn’t stay away any longer.”

“Why are you doing this?”

“Elizabeth, I have no idea.”

They sit in silence for a few minutes before he stands up and makes his way towards her again. He starts washing her, massaging shampoo into her dirty hair and then rinsing it out again. His touch is tender and she finds herself sighing repeatedly and leaning into it. When he is finished, he helps her out of the tub and towels her off, wrapping one towel around her head to cover her wet hair. He helps her into fresh pajamas, caries her over to her bed and tucks her in. He takes of his shoes and pants and gets into bed with her, snuggling up to her, spooning her. Her head is tucked underneath his chin and one of his arms is draped across her stomach, drawing lazy circles on it.

“Last week really hurt me,” she whispers. His arms tighten around her.

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“I know that all of this is my fault. That I overreacted. I know that I deserve everything you throw at me.”

“No, you don’t,” he says softly.

“Yes, I do.” 

He laughs softly, “Is it physically impossible for you to just take me at my word with anything?”

“Seems like it,” her smile is audible in her voice. But when she continues her voice is grave once more. “I’m really sorry, Rio. I thought you were getting a kick out of fucking a Stepfort wife, I never thought that there could actually be something there.”

“Oh, but I do get a kick out of fucking a Stepfort wife,” he says lightly.

She turns in his arms and brings some space between them, to be able to look him in the eye. When she speaks again her tone is urgent, she needs him to understand. “I mean it, Rio. I’m really sorry. And I don’t mean about losing my side hustle and the money that goes with it. I’m sorry I have caused you all this trouble. I’m sorry I’ve hurt you and the people close to you.” He looks into her eyes with a serious expression on his face and nods, and she knows that this is as close to forgiveness as she will get with him. He pulls her close and kisses the top of her head.

“It’s kind of turned me on, though, to know that you thought I was such a bad boy.” Laughter bubbles out of her and for a few seconds she feels as though she doesn’t have a care in the world. When her laugh dies down again, they lie tangled up for a while. Neither of them dares to speak for some time, but eventually Beth breaks the silence.

“Where does this leave us?” she asks, not really sure if she wants to know the answer.

“I still don’t see this working out,” he says in a low voice. It is the answer she has anticipated but it still cuts through her. She blinks back the tears quickly.

“Can I ask one last question, before we end this?”

“Ask away.”

“Why did you break things off between us in the first place? Only because I lost my temper?”

“For the record, the keys in the face did really hurt,” he says, his half grin in place. She knows immediately that he is dodging the question again.

“Rio.” She says his name prompting him to be straight with her.

“The way you were with Emma the night of the pancakes, I just knew I would never fit into that. I’m not warm or caring or dependable. I’m dangerous. I don’t nurse things, I destroy them. All I could ever have brought to the deal is wreckage.”

“Says the man who has just cleaned me up after hurling for three days straight. Seems like I’m not the only person who doesn’t know their worth.” 

He doesn’t respond. Instead he pulls her close one last time and kisses her on top of her head. “Goodbye, Elizabeth,” he says. Then he gets up, assembles his clothes and leaves the house.

When Beth cries herself to sleep that night, she gets the sense that this will soon become routine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. Please leave a comment, if you've enjoyed reading.
> 
> The next chapter is finished on my computer, so there is probably going to be an update tomorrow. But I am currently writing chapter 10 and as it is back to work for me tomorrow it might be a little wait between chapter 9 and 10. Sorry.
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact: There is actually a restaurant called La Laterna in our town to which this rule applies. I had a pizza there in March and it wasn't pretty. New rule: No fresh veggies, screw the oven.


	9. Cry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've decided to upload the chapter anyway. But there might be a little wait for chapter 10.

The first time Beth makes Rio cry is a week later. Although “I still don’t see this working out” sounds way less harsh than “we’re so over”, Rio doesn’t come back after taking care of her the other night. She hasn’t realized that a person could feel as bad as she does now. Her stomach bug is still rearing its ugly head at times. Though, she has to give Rio credit for his knowledge of stomach bugs, because a little soup and a cracker often help to calm her stomach again. She thinks about suing La Laterna, especially when she sits in front of the toilet bowl again. 

Her bodily pain, however, is nothing compared to how she feels inside. Over the course of the day she mostly just feels a dull ache. The kids and her work and everything she has to do keeps her busy. Although, everything feels a thousand times more exhausting. When the kids go to sleep, she rarely makes it more than thirty minutes before she retires to bed herself. But when she is in bed eventually, everything gets even worse. Then the pain isn’t just a dull ache, then it comes in waves that crash over her, consume her, leave her feeling breathless. Even though she is exhausted sleep doesn’t come easily now. She lies in her bed crying and crying until she eventually falls into a restless slumber, plagued by dreams. She doesn’t know which are worse. After a good dream she is often disoriented. It takes her a few seconds to realize that her brain has been playing tricks on her. When the pain hits her after a good dream it’s like a sledgehammer to the head. These are the days that she cries even before breakfast. On such a day Jane told her that if she just asked nicely, daddy would surely come back home. She had taken her in her arms and kissed her on top of her head. And she had felt guilty that she couldn’t hide her pain from her children, that they were worrying about her. Even Dean asked her if he could do anything to make her feel better, probably hoping that he could worm his way back in again. But having bad dreams isn’t better than having good dreams either. They make her wake up exhausted, feeling even duller and making the day an even greater challenge.

Dean takes the kids the weekend after Rio’s last visit. She is somewhat glad to have some time to rest, but the second she is in that big house alone, the walls are starting to close in on her. She calls up Annie.

“Whaasuup?” Annie sings into the phone.

“Oh, no have you been watching Scary Movie again?”

“Guilty as charged,” Annie laughs.

“I need you. Are you free tonight?”

“It’s graveyard shift for me tonight, but I feel this mean headache starting at the back of my skull.”

“You wouldn’t want to go to work sick, would you?”

“I’ll call Boomer right away. Common over as soon as you’re ready.”

“Okay, see you soon.” Just as Beth is about to hang up she hears Annie calling out her name again. “What is it?”

“Just wanted to let you know, as I’m too sick to go shopping now, it’s Bring-your-own-snacks-Night at Annie’s.” Beth laughs softly.

“Love you.”

“Love you, too, Sis.”

Beth cannot stand to be alone in the house for one more second. She takes one last look into the mirror before packing everything she needs into her handbag and makes her way to the car. She drives by Fine and Frugal on her way over to Annie. She buys different sorts of chips, some ice-cream and a bottle of vodka. When she walks by the prepared foods section she gets a few salads because she can feel her stomach rumbling. At the check-out she runs into Boomer. 

He nods at her, but doesn’t seem to want to talk to her. So, she pays and makes for the exit. It seems that he has changed his mind in the few minutes it takes her to pay. Because he comes running after her and calls out her name.

“You off to a girl`s night with your sister?” Sneaky bastard, she thinks to herself. He is trying to catch Annie lying about her illness.

“Oh no, the poor thing has a massive headache. I’m just heading over to bring her some supplies.” He glances inside her cart with raised eyebrows.

“Vodka for a headache?” Beth blushes a little. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to do her shopping at Fine and Frugal. But it is on the way and besides she always feels a thrill going into the store she has robbed twice.

“That’s for my headache. Tomorrow,” she says with an innocent voice and gives him a sweet smile. She turns on her heal and leaves the store. 

She arrives at Annie’s ten minutes later. When she knocks on her door, she can hear her shuffling inside, doing some last-minute cleaning. Annie opens the door and hugs her sister tightly. They sit down on Annie’s old, slightly stained couch and Annie switches on the TV, starting Netflix. 

They don’t talk a lot, just sit next to each other in amicable silence watching some show about a women’s prison that Beth can’t quite keep track of. She feels ravenous and munches away on the different snacks she has brought. Annie sticks to the vodka.  
“Do you want any?” she asks when she refills her glass.

“No thank you, I don’t really feel like drinking.” Come to think of it, she hasn’t had a drink since the puking has started. She doesn’t see the suspicious look on Annie’s face.

“How’s your stomach bug?” she inquires casually.

“Somewhat better, felt a little queasy earlier today, but it always gets better when I eat a little.” Annie’s eyebrows rise, but Beth is too absorbed in the coleslaw, that she has brought from the prepared foods section, to notice.

“Coleslaw, huh?”

“I know. It’s so delicious.”

“Didn’t you just have a hand full of m&m’s a second ago?”

“Yes, I’m starving.”

“Oh. My. God!” Annie shrieks. 

“What?” Beth doesn’t have the slightest idea what Annie is on about. Annie has her phone out within a second and dials Ruby’s number. Beth just stares at her uncomprehending.

“Hi, Annie,” says Ruby’s voice from the phone. Annie puts her on speaker.

“Hi. Uhm, so Beth is pregnant. Can you please drive to the next pharmacy, get a test and bring it round my flat so we can be sure?”

“WHAT?” Beth and Ruby screech in unison. The coleslaw falls from Beth’s hand onto the already stained couch, marking it even further.

“She eating coleslaw again?” Ruby asks.

“Yup.”

“Well, it’s serious then. I’m on my way.” She hangs up.

Beth is in shock. The world around her ceases to exist. All she can hear is her breathing, her heartbeat and a distinct ringing in her ears. Her face feels numb, so do her hands. How is this even possible? After Emma the doctors had told her that she probably wasn’t going to be able to get pregnant again. Something about intrauterine adhesions. She hadn’t listened properly back then because she was so overjoyed at the little pink bundle in her arms. She had deduced that it wasn’t anything serious or life threatening and had just tuned out the doctor, looking at her baby girl in awe. Dean and her hadn’t had sex afterwards anyway so she never had put any thought to contraception. Right before she had found out about Dean’s affair, she wanted to get their sex life going again. She had bought a pack of condoms just in case, made an appointment at her OB-GYN and at the salon. But after her credit card had been declined, she never made it to her doctor’s appointment. 

Now that the thinks about it, she should have recognized the signs. The last time she’s had a stomach bug of this proportion was when she was pregnant with Emma and it wasn’t a stomach bug at all. That was also the last time she’s had coleslaw. Because she hates coleslaw. Only she doesn’t hate it when she’s pregnant. Then she craves it. 

But this couldn’t be. They had always used condoms. Unless, the bastard has fucked her without a condom when she didn’t realize it. He must have taken advantage of his effect on her. When they started kissing she was so far gone within seconds, that it must have been easy to trick her. That’s when the rage hits her.

“No!” is the first thing she says, after sitting motionless for minutes. “No. No. No. No. No.” She gets up and starts pacing the length of Annie’s living-room. “No. No. No.” She shakes her head every few feet and keeps repeating the word over and over again. 

She is only shaken out of her musings, when gentle, yet strong arms circle around her. Ruby has arrived and taken her into her arms. That’s when she begins to cry. 

“This wasn’t supposed to happen.”

“Calm down, honey. Nothing is set in stone, yet. Just take the test first and if it really is positive, we’ll see from there. Okay?” Ruby coos. 

“It’s true. I don’t need the test. It’s true.” Beth’s voice is haunted.

They still manage to get her into the bathroom to pee onto the stick. When she returns from the bathroom she is still in shock, staring off into the distance, plotting Rio’s death in her head. They have set the timer for three minutes and for a few seconds no one speaks.

“How could this have happened?” Ruby breaks the silence.

“I would have thought you knew all about the birds and the bees,” Annie jokes, although her stained voice belies her attempt at making light of the situation.

“Shut up,” says Ruby. They both look at Beth.

“He must have tricked me. He must have taken the condom off,” says Beth voice hollow.

“What a dick!” Beth doesn’t answer. There are no words. 

“Will you tell him?” Annie asks.

“Will you keep it?” Ruby.

Beth just stares at them blankly. “I’m going to bed,” she says, leaving her to best friends in Annie’s living-room and heading for her bedroom. She climbs into the bed without taking her clothes of and pulls the blanket over her head. She turns towards the wall and stares at it. She can hear their muffled voices for a while before she hears the door open and then close and Ruby is gone. When Annie comes into the room, Beth pretends to be asleep. She knows that she doesn’t fool her sister, but she is no mood to talk. Eventually she falls asleep.

When she wakes up the next morning, she feels queasy again. When she opens the fridge, she sees the coleslaw, but the thought of it makes her so angry that she closes it again. She takes a couple of steps away, but when her stomach lurches she eats it anyway. Annie tip-toes around her, unsure of how to talk to her.

“Do you want me to accompany you to the doctor’s?” she eventually offers. Beth just shakes her head.

“You know, there is this walk-in clinic. I went there when I was pregnant with Sadie and didn’t want anyone to find out. I’ll write down the address for you.”

When Beth walks into the bathroom to take a shower, she sees the test, that she hasn’t bothered to look at yesterday, lying on the sink. She can see a distinct second line that confirms what she already knows. She takes her shower and then heads for the clinic alone. “Call me when you’re done there,” Annie calls after her.

At the clinic she takes another test that comes to the same conclusion as the first one. She then has an ultrasound. When she sees the little blob on the screen, her stupor finally breaks.

“I thought I couldn’t get pregnant,” she says.

“You and your husband must be over the moon,” the ultrasound technician says cheerily.

“It’s not my husband’s,” Beth answers flatly.

“Oh,” the technician, Marcia as it says on her name tag, is embarrassed. She measures the baby and searches for the heartbeat. When Beth hears it for the first time tears rush to her eyes.

“This wasn’t supposed to happen,” she sobs.

“Mrs. Boland, if you are considering not having this baby you need to decide soon. You’re already ten weeks along.” She wipes Beth’s stomach clean and gives her time to right her clothes. Beth walks over to her desk and sits down in one of the chairs.  
“Wait here a second, I’m going to send a doctor in right away.”

Beth stares at the printout that lies on the desk before her until the doctor comes in a few minutes later. They shake hands when he comes in and he sits down across from her.

“So, Marcia tells me you’re considering terminating this pregnancy.” Beth nods.

“As you’re already quite far along we have to be quick about this. I want to schedule an appointment for next Tuesday. That gives you two days to think it over.” Beth starts to cry again.

“I’m very sorry Mrs. Boland. I don’t mean to rush you, but there is really not a lot of time.” He hands her some brochures.   
“You can read all about the procedure in these brochures. I’m going to write you up for some prenatal vitamins in case you decide against the procedure.”

She takes the prescription from him. “Thank you.”

“If you need help deciding, we have a psychologist and a few social workers you could talk to. I can schedule an appointment for Monday if you’d like.”

“That won’t be necessary. Thank you,” she says before she stands up and leaves the clinic. She drives straight to the next pharmacy. Her decision has been made up since she’s first heard the heartbeat. 

The next thing on her agenda is to call Rio. When she is home, she takes out her phone and calls his number. But of course, he has changed numbers since she has last called him. All she hears is a recorded announcement that this number is out of service. She curses and calls Annie instead and tells her about her visit to the clinic and her decision.

“Are you going to tell him?” Annie asks.

“That’s the plan. But I don’t know how to reach him. His phone is out of service.”

“How did you contact him before?”

“I didn’t. He always just showed up.”

“Hmm. Do you know where he lives?” Annie tries.

“No. We’ve only ever met here or in the warehouse.”

“Okay. Go there then. Do you want me to come?” Beth is seriously thankful for Annie’s support but this is something she has to do by herself.

“Thanks Annie, but I kind of feel like I have to do this on my own.”

They talk for a few minutes before they hang up. Beth packs the ultrasound printout into her purse and walks to her car. She doesn’t drive straight to the warehouse, but takes a couple of detours, stalling for time. At the warehouse she parks her care in front a security camera near the entrance and flares the horn. When no one comes out she honks a second time. She is about to get out of the car when the door opens and Carlos steps out. He walks over to her car and she lets the window roll down. He doesn’t say hello but just stands before her car waiting for her to speak.

“Will you please tell him I need to talk to him. It’s urgent. I’ll wait here.”

Carlos turns without a word and walks back into the warehouse. Beth waits for two hours, before she’s fed up and drives home again. 

On her way home, she stops at a pizza place and gets dinner for herself. Once she makes it to the house, she throws her bag and coat into a corner and walks towards the sofa. She sits down and starts to watch some Netflix, munching on her pizza. She is beyond pissed at Rio, but through four pregnancies she has learned that it’s always best to give the little parasites what they want or else you’ll be paying through the nose. 

She lies back a little and puts her feet on the table, her hand comes to rest on her stomach of its own accord. She still feels overwhelmed, but she cannot help but smile. There is another tiny human growing inside of her. The thought fills her with as much love as she feels for her other children.

“You summoned me?” She jumps a little, taking her hand from her stomach immediately.

“I’ve waited for two hours!” she says angrily.

“I was working. I can’t just come running whenever you feel the itch.”

“Fuck you! I said, I needed to talk to you!”

“I’m here now. What do you want to say?” She stands up from the sofa and stalks towards him. She is furious. Not only has he fucked her without a condom, now he was giving her this attitude as if she has asked for any of this.

“You are such a fucking asshole!” His lips twitch, he’s fighting a smile. It doesn’t escape her and it makes her even angrier. She comes to stand before him. “You are such a low-life, shady, fucking scoundrel!” 

“Scoundrel?” he asks barely suppressing a chuckle. “Excuse me, m’Lady,” he mocks, tipping an invisible fedora, “I didn’t know this was 1932.”

The more he mocks her, the angrier she gets. Tears well up in her eyes and threaten to fall, when she brings up her hand and pokes him in the chest with her index finger. “You!”

When she lets her hand fall down, he clasps his hand above his heart as if she’s shot him. It seems that the angrier she gets the more fun he gets out of mocking her. She stares at him angrily, but he isn’t impressed. He puts his hands on her hips and pulls her close. She tries to resist but the moment she catches a hint of his intoxicating scent, her resistance crumbles. He brings their lips together lightly and when she doesn’t respond with the kind of enthusiasm he is used to, he starts trailing kisses down her neck. She cannot suppress a moan when he slightly sucks on her pulse point. He chuckles lightly and says, “Am I right to assume that this is why I’m here?”

“What? No!” she stutters.

“What is it you wanted to talk to me about then?” He is annoyed.

“You fucked me without a condom,” she whispers.

“No, I didn’t” he snaps.

“Yes, you did.”

“Why does it even matter?” He walks towards the sofa and flips down on it. “Oh pizza,” he says delighted and helps himself to a slice. “No booze tonight?” he calls out.

She goes into the kitchen and pours him a drink. She hands it to him and sits down at the opposite end of the sofa. She looks him over intently while he happily munches on the pizza. It hurts her that he is so detached. As if nothing’s ever happened between them. As if they didn’t both know that there was more than fucking between them. He acts as if she’s summoned him here on a booty call when he is so close to breaking her heart for good. She wants to slap the pizza right out of his hand but refrains. When he looks over at her he sees her dark and brooding expression and says, “I swear, I haven’t fucked you without a condom!”

“Well, the pregnancy tests I took yesterday and this morning, tell of a different story.” He looks shell-shocked, face slack, mouth slightly agape for a few seconds before he recovers, slipping his careless mask back on. He shrugs. “Well, congratulations to you and your husband then.”

Anger flares inside of her, her heartbeat picks up, her hand shake. “You know as well as I do, that Dean hasn’t set foot in this house since the night you beat the hell out of him.”

“Nah... stop shittin’ me. I know he’s been around. My boys have seen him wandering in here.”

“To talk! I was speaking metaphorically,” she cries. Tears start to prickle in her eyes. This is definitely not going the way she has originally planned. He is the one who is in the wrong here, not her.

“Oh really,” he taunts.

“I haven’t had sex with anyone but you in five years,” she whispers. He raises one eyebrow questioning the truth behind her statement. She gets up from the sofa and walks to get her purse. She digs through it and comes to stand before him. She hands him the print. 

“You will have to take my word for it. This is your baby.” He looks at the print. Beth thinks, that he probably doesn’t even notice his mask slipping off his face. His features rearrange somewhere between awe and... defeat?

“You sure it’s mine?” he whispers.

“There’s no one else,” she answers. “I have until Tuesday to decide how I want to proceed.”

“Proceed?” He’s still whispering. She is sure he knows what she is talking about but explains anyway. “I have to decide if I want to have this baby.” Emotions cross his face too fast for her to decipher all of them, but pain and longing are among the most prominent.

“Are you considering... not having...” he breaks off. The pain is so evident in his voice and in his face that Beth is on him, straddling him in a heartbeat. She cups his face with her hands, stroking his jawline with her thumbs. He pulls her close to him, burying his face in the crook of her neck. He breathes her in, but it sounds ragged. She cannot help the feeling that he might be... she pulls his head back. It turns out she is right. When she looks into his face, his brows are furrowed, his eyes red, wetness covers his cheeks. She locks eyes with him and brushed away a tear. “Please don’t abort my baby,” he begs in a strained voice.

“I won’t. I’ve already made up my mind to have this baby. I just needed to know what you think.” That’s when she kisses him. It’s as if all her worries fall from her. She feels light and carless and happy for the first time in two months. He kisses her back lightly, runs his tongue along her lower lip. She gasps as desire shoots through her and he takes it as an invitation to slip his tongue inside her mouth. His kiss is needy and hungry and he pulls her even closer, almost painfully so. She tries to reassure him with her kisses but his kisses become more and more insistent. 

He grabs her underneath her thighs and makes to stand up from the couch. She circles him with her legs and her arms cling to his neck as he carries her up the stairs into her bedroom. 

They fall onto the bed together still kissing but the pace changes. His hands are on her face now, caressing her cheeks, one finger tracing her eyebrow, then her ear. His soft and tender kisses go straight to her heart. He trails kisses from her mouth, down her neck to her collarbone. While her hands stroke his neck, his hands go to work on the buttons of her blouse. With each button that goes, his kisses trail further down her body. Her eyes drift shut, while she revels at the sensation of his mouth on her especially after she has been so sure that this kind of thing wouldn’t happen anymore. 

He takes her blouse off and when she reaches for his shirt, he takes it off as well. Her hands fly to his chest and she starts caressing every inch of skin she can reach. He moans softly as he starts fumbling with her bra. His hands shake and he can’t get it to open. So, she reaches around her back and opens it for him. His mouth comes down on her breasts, kissing them, circling one nipple after the other with his tongue, then takes it into his mouth and sucks lightly. 

She arches her back, trying to get closer to him. She needs more contact, her legs come around his hips and pull him closer. Her hands fly to his belt buckle and he lets out a long, strained groan that goes straight to her clit. He opens the zipper of her skirt and pulls it down together with her panties, then he grabs her ankles and pushes them up, opening her legs so he can look at her. She feels self-conscious for a second until she looks up into his face and sees the look that he gives her. There is hunger there and lust, but also pain, longing and wonder. He looks at her like she is the most precious thing he’s ever laid eyes on.   
Then he bends down and kisses her there. His tongue runs along her lips for what seems like forever, before he lets it dip between them, brushing over her clit. She arches her back as desire flashes through her. Her hips buck of their own accord, but his hands come up towards her hips and he holds her down while proceeding to drive her crazy. His tongue circles her clit, sending sparks of pleasure through her body. Then he lets it wander down, thrusting it inside her. One of his hands trails down from her hips and he pushes two long, delicious fingers inside of her. She cries out when he picks up a slow and sensual rhythm and starts to suck on her clit. She can feel her orgasm approaching.

“Rio,” she whispers voice ragged. He growls into her, the vibrations increasing her pleasure, sending her closer to the edge. “Please Rio, I want to come with you inside of me.” He groans again. The sound is filled with so much emotion that it makes her chest constrict. Her hands fly to his head. She wants to pull him to her, but he doesn’t budge. He keeps up the rhythm of thrusting in and out of her while licking and sucking at her clit until she cannot think anymore, but just buck her hips and wait for the inevitable. She comes harder than ever before in her life and cries out while her muscles contract around his fingers.

When he crawls up towards her, she can taste herself on his tongue when she kisses him. It takes her a few minutes to recover. He kisses her and caresses her hair, twisting it between his fingers. “Get off your pants,” she whispers. He shakes his head softly, but kisses her anyway. When she pushes him onto his back he doesn’t resist. She straddles him, kisses him, trails more kisses down his torso. When she reaches the waistband of his jeans, she unbuckles his belt, then gets to work on his fly. She pulls his pants down and he kicks them off. She nuzzles the velvety length of his cock, feeling his intense gaze on her. When she takes the tip into her mouth his hips buck involuntarily and he groans loudly. She works him relentlessly, bringing him closer and closer to the edge and when she feels his muscles go tense and knows he is about to come she slows down again, denying him his release. When his breathing evens out, she picks up speed again bringing him close again and just like minutes before she slows down as soon as she detects the first telltale sign of his impending orgasm. “Fuck Beth! You’re going to kill me,” he grinds out. 

She chuckles softly. “I told you, I want to come with you inside me.” She climbs off of him and lies next to him, kissing him hungrily. He kisses her back and she can feel that he seriously needs to come, but he pulls back, locking eyes with her. “Won’t I... you know... hurt the baby?” It takes everything in her not to burst out laughing, but at the same time her heart swells at the sight of him, uncertainly gnawing on his lower lip.

“You won’t,” she whispers, kissing him lightly. He moves on top of her, positioning himself between her lips, the tip of his cock resting against her entrance. She tries to scoot down, forcing him inside but he isn’t having it. He locks eyes with her again. “You sure?” She nods and he slides his cock inside her. A long, ragged groans escapes him and his head sags unto her shoulder. He stills for a few second, before he kisses her. She bites his lower lip and then whispers against his lips, “Move, Rio.” He complies. He pulls almost all the way out and slowly slides into her again. He kisses her deeply, his arms circling her and pulling her close to him. It takes a few moments for him to forget his worries and he starts fucking her in earnest. Pleasure spikes inside of her, it is as if he senses it as he moves his hand between them, rubbing his thumb slowly over her clit. Her legs come around him again, pulling him closer as their bodies move together, getting closer and closer to the edge. He shifts his position, pushing into her at a new angle that makes her cry out in ecstasy. It only takes a couple of thrusts until her muscles start to tighten around him and as her orgasm crashes around her, he is sent over the edge as well, thrusting into her one last time, burying himself inside her as deep as he can. She can feel his cock pulsing inside of her, spreading his hot release. 

He collapses on top of her and remains on top of her unmoving and boneless for a few minutes. When he finally pulls out, Beth hisses at the feeling of loss. But he pulls her close as soon as he has settled beside her, spooning her. They don’t speak for some time. Beth is almost certain that he has fallen asleep, when he whispers, “It was the other way `round.”

“Huh?” She doesn’t have a clue what he is talking about.

“You fucked me without a condom.”

“What? No!” She is confused. What is he saying? That, certainly, can’t be true.

“Yes, sure! Remember the pancakes?” That’s when it hits her. This is her fault. They had gone upstairs and she had taken control, taking him, riding him without even wasting a single thought on condoms. She sits bolt upright. Turning towards him.

“I never... but it was only... that one time,” she stammers.

“Once is really all it takes, Elizabeth. Didn’t you pay attention in school?” He raises an amused eyebrow.

“I’m so sorry. I never meant to trick you or anything!” Her voice is urgent, she needs him to believe her.

“It’s okay,” he says.

“You’re not mad?”

“Sweetheart, I don’t know how I feel right now.” He pulls her to him and she snuggles into him. For a long time none of them speaks. Beth is lost in thought. She doesn’t like the turn this evening has taken. She was so sure that Rio is the one who’s fucked up, but again it’s her. And although, what they have done just half an hour ago feels an awful lot like making up, she still isn’t sure. When he says that he isn’t sure how he feels, that leaves her unsure as well. Unsure where they stand and how this will continue. She knows how she wants this to continue, but maybe that’s just not in the cards for them. Maybe they are too different.

“Can we name her Maria? Ria for short? That was my grandma’s name,” he suddenly says. Beth cannot help the snort that escapes her.

“Rio and Ria? Are you kidding? And besides, how do you even know it’s going to be a girl.”

“I just know.” She turns to him and looks into his eyes.

“Well, the name isn’t absolutely vomit inducing, so it’s a possibility,” she says, eyes twinkling with mischief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! You were right. She is pregnant.
> 
> I'm not 100 % sure how I'm going to resolve everything in the last chapter. I feel that being pregnant cannot mean that Beth is automatically forgiven for everything. I would think that the gang needs her to prove herself. Do you have any suggestions? I have an idea in my head, but I'm not all set on it yet.
> 
> Since this is a long chapter, I hope you can forgive me if you have to wait a little on chapter 10.


	10. Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth isn't the only one who doesn't know her worth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought maybe you'd appreciate it, if I uploaded two slightly shorter chapters instead of one very long chapter. That's why the total number of chapters is up to 11. 
> 
> I'm sorry for the long wait, though. Real life has gotten me back, I have a lot of work right now and, therefore, cannot write as much as I would like to. Also I was struggling to resolve the story in a way that felt right to me.
> 
> I hope you enjoy.

The first time she says ‘I love you’ is a few weeks later.

A lot has changed since Beth has broken the news of her pregnancy to Rio. For one thing, Beth is out of a job again. Rio insists that she quits, although she tells him time and time again that she isn’t sick but pregnant. He points out that too much stress will harm the baby and that he has seen the way she has struggled with the kids and the job. Four kids are more than enough work without her worrying about making ends meet. She finds a bundle of notes on her kitchen counter one morning together with a steaming mug of herbal tea. Rio must have snuck into the house while she was taking a shower. She doesn’t want to use his money, especially not before they really have a talk about what has happened between them and what is going to happen in the future. She opens her clutter drawer and just dumps the cash inside. 

She notices more black cars parked in front of her house now. When she asks Rio about it he says that his boys are watching out for her when he’s not around. She feels uneasy about them having to spend their time protecting her when she is the one that has betrayed them. She feels useless. Being pregnant doesn’t leave her with many options to prove herself to them. She starts bringing coffee down to them.

The first time she does it’s Carlos in the sedan. She knows he is a hard nut to crack, but tries anyway. When she knocks on the tinted window, he rolls it down and watches her quietly, face expressionless. She hands him the mug and says, “Thought you might be thirsty.” 

He takes the mug and sips the coffee and is about to roll up the window, when she hastily says, “I wanted to speak to you, if that’s okay with you.” He doesn’t move. So outside it is. “I’m sorry, Carlos. I really am sorry for what I did.” He snorts obviously not believing her or not caring what she has to say. “You have a family. Rio tells me you do.” He raises an eyebrow unsure where she is going with this. “I thought he was going to hurt my family. I just tried to protect my family. You have to understand what that’s like.” He does, she can see it in his eyes. “I wish there was something that I could do to prove to you how sorry I am.” He sips his coffee again. 

“Good coffee,” he says gruffly. “Would be better with some milk and sugar.” 

She beams a smile at him. “Wouldn’t have taken you for the milk and sugar kind of guy.” When he furrows his brows slightly she quickly says, “Be right back,” then walks to the house hurriedly and grabs the milk and sugar. When she’s back, he rolls the window down again and adds two sugar cubes and a little milk to his coffee. She hands him a spoon to stir.

“You can come to the house, if you like. This job might be a bit more tolerable with some TV or Netflix.” He doesn’t look convinced. “Lunch is at 2,” she adds before she turns on her heel and walks back into the house. She decides to get some housework done and when she starts chopping vegetables for lunch, she hears a knock at the front door. It’s Carlos holding out an empty mug towards her. She steps back to let him in. 

“More?” she asks, and when he nods she makes her way to the kitchen and refills his mug, adding sugar and milk. Carlos is already sitting on the sofa, flipping through the channels, when she returns with his coffee. She is pleased that has come inside. Although she is sure that he hasn’t forgiven her, at least this is a step in the right direction.

He has lunch with her and the kids. “Who’s that?” Emma asks when she sees Carlos.

“That’s mommy’s friend, Carlos. He’s having lunch with us today.”

The kids go over to Carlos and introduce themselves one by one. When they ask him questions he answers politely. Emma wants to touch his face tattoos and he lets her climb into his lap. Beth cannot help but be proud of her little girl and her total lack of prejudice. Although it doesn’t come as a surprise. They have reacted in a similarly polite way when they first met Rio. To be honest, she has an inkling that they were quite impressed with their mommy’s cool friend. Especially the boys.

When they have finished their meal, Carlos helps her put away the dishes.

“Carlos,” Emma asks in a sweet voice, “do you want to come to my room and play with my dolls?” Beth snorts and even Carlos cannot fight a small smile. She had asked Rio the same question and he had actually agreed, gone up to her room and an hour later Beth had found him wearing a tiara and a feather boa. Beth had laughed harder than she had in years.

“No, sweetie. I have to help your mother a little more.” Emma’s face falls a little and she lets out a disappointed sigh.

“Maybe next time?” she asks.

“You bet,” he says, ruffling her hair. Emma beams at him and bounces up the stairs towards her room.

When she has finished cleaning up she goes to sit next to Carlos on the sofa. They sit in silence for a few minutes before Beth speaks again.

“Will you do me a favor, Carlos?”, she asks. He turns towards her, giving her a look that tells her he is already starting to regret leaving his car.

“I would like to visit the wives.” He doesn’t even pretend to not know what she is talking about. 

“Why?” he asks.

“Well I think they should know who’s responsible for their situation. I would like to apologize and maybe there’s a way I can help them out.” She has been thinking about going there for quite some time now. Carlos looks at the TV again. A few minutes pass and Beth begins to wonder whether this is him shooting her down, but then he says, “next week.”

“Thank you. Can I interest you in a beer?” He nods and she makes her way into the kitchen again. She reaches the beer to him from behind and when he takes it from her, her hand rests on his shoulder for a second and squeezes lightly. She proceeds to make herself busy around the house, still not entirely comfortable with having him around. 

 

Bullit, Mr. Cisco and Eddie are way less work than Carlos. She brings them coffee just the same, invites them in and it takes them exactly one of her homemade cookies and they happily chat away with her. She sits in her kitchen joking with Eddie one day, when Annie comes in. 

“Heya, Sis! How’s it going,” she hollers on her way in. She stops in her tracks when she sees Eddie sitting at the dining room table. She hasn’t gotten used to the idea of Rio’s boys being around the house. Carlos still scares her half to death after all these times he has pulled a gun on them. Eddie however, doesn’t look half as scary. He is smaller than the others and his eyes often have a boyish glint to them. Although, heavily tattooed, his face is ink free, which makes him seem less dangerous. Beth often wonders how he has gotten into the gang business, he has a rather sunny disposition about him and she just can’t for the life of her picture him intimidating anyone. Despite the fact, that he was intimidating Annie right now.

“You remember Eddie?” Beth asks, smiling at Annie reassuringly. 

“Hi,” Eddie quips.

“Hi,” Annie says uncertain.

“I’m not going to point my gun at you today,” he says, guessing what she was thinking about.

“Gonna break any fingers?” she inquires. He shakes his head, chuckling.

“Good to know.” She sits down, leaving a couple of chairs between herself and Eddie just to be sure. But it doesn’t take long until she warms up to him and they start to talk. When Beth starts on lunch they wander over to the sofa and she can hear them cracking jokes and laughing. She knew that they would get along.

When she walks over to get them, Annie is holding her stomach and wiping her eyes. Even as a kid Annie always had to do exactly what her big sister did. 

 

Rio comes by this evening while the kids are still watching TV. “Rio!” Kenny shouts and jumps off the sofa. He gives him some complicated handshake that makes Beth laugh quietly.

“You finished your homework, yet?” Rios asks.

“Yes!” Kenny answers quickly but doesn’t meet his gaze.

“You sure ‘bout that?”

“I couldn’t do math. It’s too difficult,” he admits.

“Fetch your stuff, I’m gonna help you.” Kenny dashes up the stairs to fetch his stuff. Rio goes over to Beth, hand reaching out for her belly while he presses a soft kiss to her temple.

“Hi,” he murmurs against her hair. Then he goes over to the sofa to greet the kids before heading back to the dining room table. Within five minutes Rio and Kenny are absorbed in Kenny’s math homework. Beth goes upstairs to collect the kids’ dirty clothes to put on a final load for the day. When she comes back down, Emma has left the couch and is now sitting in Rio’s lap, tracing his tattoos with her tiny fingers. His hand is playing with a strand of her hair absentmindedly while he is explaining something to Kenny. The sight makes her heart swell. So much has happened in the last few weeks that her head is spinning at times. She has been afraid of this man for such a long time, while simultaneously lusting after him, of course, and now she was swooning at the sight of him with her kids. Must be the pregnancy hormones, she thinks. Or love, an unexpected voice inside her head quips. 

“Time for bed,” she says. 

Emma looks up at Rio. “Will you read me my bedtime story?” 

“Let’s go then,” Rio says and throws her over his shoulder. She giggles and screeches as they make their way up the stairs.

“But Mum,” Kenny protests, “I’ve barely watched any TV tonight.”

“No, Kenny. It’s a school night,” Beth says.

“But Muuum,” Kenny whines. “Dad would let me...”

“Listen to Mamma, Kenny,” comes Rio’s voice from upstairs. Kenny’s shoulders slump a little and he kicks the chair lightly on his way, but he goes upstairs anyway. Beth chuckles to herself while putting the clothes into the washing machine. When she makes her way upstairs to say goodnight to her kids, she finds Rio and Emma cuddled together while he reads to her. Emma is already starting to drift off. When he spots her, he raises one finger to his lips, reminding her to be quiet. She smiles at him and walks over to the boys. She kisses their foreheads and turns off the lights. When she passes by Emma’s and Jane’s room, she hears Rio quietly getting up.

“You have to check for monsters,” comes Emma sleepy voice. She hears him walking around the room, then opening the door to the closet, “no monsters here, sweetheart,” he says and then walks out of the door straight into her.

“Hi there,” she whispers. He grabs her around the waist and pulls her close. When their lips touch, he starts to push her towards the bedroom. 

“No,” Beth says. He growls a little but continues nuzzling her neck, sucking at her pulse point.

“No,” she repeats. He stops then, pushes her away gently but gives an annoyed grunt while passing her on his way down. When she catches up with him he has already flopped down onto the couch, switching through the channels.  
“Are you angry with me?” she asks, sitting next to him.

“Nah,” he answers, but doesn’t make eye-contact. She doesn’t know what to say or do, so she just sits there. After a few minutes he scoots closer to her, puts his arm around her and pulls her close. What is going on with him and these mixed signals tonight? They stay cuddled up for some time until Beth yawns heartily. 

“You should go to bed,” he murmurs. She gets up and stretches lazily. Her hands go to her neck and she starts unbuttoning her blouse. Talking to him might not work, but she knows something else that will get her his attention.

“Will you stay over,” she asks in a sweet voice holding one hand out for him to take. He takes her hand and they make it to the bedroom.

He closes the door behind them and before she knows it she is naked and he is trailing kisses from her knees up her thighs. When he kisses her, a hot flash of desire shoots through her and it takes every inch of self-control she can muster not to cry out and wake the kids. His tongue is on her, circling her clit then wandering down, thrusting inside. Her head swims, her ears ring, her vision blurs, everything around her fades while all she can feel are those lips and this tongue on her. That is until two long fingers slide inside of her and start moving at a deliciously slow pace in and out of her. She clenches her jaws in an attempt to keep it quiet, her hands grab the linens so tightly that her knuckles are turning white and her hips are moving of their own accord, trying to increase the friction. Rio’s hand comes to rest on her stomach, keeping her still and when he sucks her clit into his mouth, she comes gloriously. Wave upon wave of pleasure crashes over her, rocking her body, muscles contracting around his fingers.

When she turns boneless in his arms, he slowly crawls up towards her and captures her lips in a fierce kiss. He rips at his clothes, trying to get them off as fast as possible. She helps him pull his pants down, because even though he has just made her come, she cannot wait to have him inside of her. He grabs his cock in his hands and lets the head rub over the sensitive bundle of nerves, her whole body convulses at the touch. Then he slides inside of her and a low growl escapes his throat. It must be the sexiest sound that Beth has ever heard. He engages her lips in a sloppy kiss and starts to move inside her. All of the sensations threaten to overwhelm her and she feels the moans inside of her, ready to leave her lips. But she keeps them back, the need to keep it quiet making this all the more exciting. She lets her fingernails scratch over his back and he takes it as a cue to up his pace. She feels the pressure building again. It’s weird how her body reacts to him. With Dean she had been lucky if she came once, but with him she has this intense chemistry that makes her come time and time again. Soon his movement become twitchy and she knows he is close as well. She pushes him back a little, wanting to switch positions. But instead of lying on his back he turns her around so she faces the headboard and takes her from behind. She grips the headboard for support, while the angle at which he thrusts inside of her changes which makes it’s all the more pleasurable. She hears the sounds of the skin of his thighs slapping against her behind repeatedly and it turns her on to no end. He leans forward and his hands wander to her breasts, pinching one of her nipples almost painfully. When his thrusts come even faster and his movements become jerky she takes one hand off the headboard massaging her clit. It doesn’t take long until her inner muscles clench around him. When she becomes this impossibly tight, it only takes him a couple of more thrusts until he comes as well, flooding her with his hot release. 

They collapse onto the bed and he pulls her close to her, breathing a contented sigh. Her head rests on his arm while he plays with a strand of her hair. 

“You sure, we’re not hurting the baby when we fuck like that?” he whispers. She just snorts quietly, but doesn’t answer. They have had this discussion countless times by now and every time they have had sex afterwards he dared to let loose a little more. They don’t speak for some time, but neither of them falls asleep. She knows because he keeps playing with her hair.

“What are you thinking about?” she asks. He doesn’t answer her and after a few minutes she grows impatient. “What is up with you? I feel like you’re avoiding to talk to me.”

“Nah, I’m not,” he says. 

“Oh come on!” she snaps. “You haven’t spoken two sentences today.” He still doesn’t say anything and it is driving her mad. She feels like slapping him. Up until a few days ago she thought that they were over this. That they are finally going to be together, but he is shutting her out again, not talking, not even looking at her at times.

“What is going on?” her voice cracks a little as tears threaten spill from her eyes.

“Haven’t I been here almost every evening?” he asks. She nods. “Haven’t I met your kids? Haven’t I hit it off with them?” She nods again but doesn’t comprehend. 

“Yes, but...”

“Haven’t I fucked you every night? Wasn’t it top notch?”

“Sure,” she blushes a little, “but I don’t understand what you’re getting at.”

“Can’t you just leave it at that? Do you have to push me?”

“How am I pushing you? I just want to talk to you.” She is beyond confused. And hurt by the way he is treating her like she has done something wrong when she doesn’t even know what he is talking about. 

“Yeah,” he taunts, “and don’t I know what you want to talk about.” Beth is taken aback. She doesn’t know what he is on about.

“Excuse me?”

“Don’t play daft with me,” he says annoyed. But she isn’t. She honestly has no idea what he is on about. 

“I’m not. I don’t know what you’re talking about. What do you think I want to say?” The more she says the angrier he gets. What is going on right now? The tears finally fall, as he gets out of bed, looking down at her.

“I know what you want!” he accuses. 

“What?”

“You want me to quit! You are not going to let me be part of this family unless I go legit!” he spits. 

She looks at him dumbstruck. Not for one second has she at any time considered the possibility of him going legit. They’ve met because she robbed a grocery store together with her best friend and sister for fuck’s sake. When he let her off the hook, she was the one to contact him again, wanting back in. For the last weeks, since she has been forced out bey her own stupid actions, she has been simultaneously stressed and bored with her life. Stressed by the fact that the day didn’t seem to have enough hours for her to get everything done and bored because everything she did seemed so tedious that it left her wanting to claw her eyes out. There hasn’t been a single day that she hasn’t regretted what she did to him, but not only because she had hurt him and they had broken up about it, but because she craved to go back to work for him. It made feel her like such a badass, it made her feel in control and it made her feel alive for the first time in so long.

“How do you come to this conclusion?” she asks softly. He laughs bitterly, anger giving way to a pained look on his face.

“Why would you want me around your children? Around our child? I’m toxic. I’m going to ruin all of this.” She stands and walks over to him, reaching out for him, but he flinches back. He doesn’t want her reassurance, her pity and most of all he needs to steel himself for the moment when the truth will finally fall from her lips. She lets her hand drop but looks into his eyes steadily.

“Why do you think so?” Her voice and eyes are soft. She feels the tears sting again. It hurts to hear what he thinks of himself.

“I told you not to play daft with me,” he snaps.

“Well, then tell me, what I did that gave you the impression that I would want you to go legit in order to join this family!”

“You would be stupid not to! The feds nearly got me once. It’s only a matter of time. In my line of work, it’s not a question of if but of when. And when it happens, I’m going to drag you down with me.” His voice is strained. Pain seems to be seeping out of his pores. He looks crushed and broken. Her heart lurches, beats irregularly in her chest, heavy with the need to reassure him. And suddenly she feels their roles reversed. She is in control, she is the one that knows how this kind of thing works and she is teaching him. Just as he has been when it came to crime. 

“Listen up,” she says in a low yet strong and confident voice. His head, that he has let sink into his hands, shoots up to look her in the eyes. “You are going to do as you see fit. If the arrival of your child makes you realize that the risks aren’t worth taking, go legit. I will gladly live in a ditch, just as long as you keep looking at me the way you do when we’re alone. And if you want to continue doing what you do, do it. I know that you will never let anything happen to me or the kids. And if the feds ever get you, then you and the kids and I will get through it. I want you. Not some idea of you that I made up in my head.”

“You’re crazy,” he says, defeated.

“No, I’m not. I’m just very clear about what I have gotten myself into. And I do not regret it.” She moves towards him, reaches her hand towards his face. This time he doesn’t flinch, but leans into her touch.

“Why?” he whispers.

“You’re so convinced that you are scum, that you do not see your own worth. The way you are with the children, how could I not want you in this family?” An involuntary smile pulls at his lips. He drops his gaze from her eyes before he mumbles, “I seem to remember telling you, you didn’t know your worth not too long ago.”

“It seems we have that in common.” 

And she kisses him. Brushes her lips against his in a feather light touch, before pressing them against him more firmly, running her tongue along his bottom lip, then sucking it into her mouth, letting her teeth graze the delicate skin. He moans into her mouth and his left arm comes around her waist, pulling her closer to his body, while his right hand reaches for her face. He cups her cheek for a second before his fingers trace her hairline, then her neck, her collarbone and finally snake around her back, pulling her impossibly closer. She stirs him to the bed, walking him backwards until his calves hit the frame. She pushes him down onto it and he looks up at her from a sitting position.

She holds his face in her hands and looks into his eyes, when she says, “I love you, Rio.” And it isn’t because she feels she has to reassure him or because it fits the situation. She says it because it is what she feels. His eyes blaze up with desire and he pulls her down onto his lap, sheathing his erect cock inside of her velvety warmth. They both moan as pleasure rips through them, eyes never leaving the other. They kiss again, slow and sensual, and when she begins to move on top of him he wraps his arms around her, craving the feel of her skin against his. By the feel of his cock inside her she can tell that he is close and she clenches her muscles around him, making a string of expletives leave his lips. When he feels his orgasm approach, he tries to shift position, knowing that she isn’t close to finishing yet. He releases her from his embrace and tries to lift her off his lap, but she isn’t having it. This is about him, she needs him to understand. She takes his arms and wraps herself in them again, slightly upping the pace of her hips. She kisses him tenderly, when she feels his cock pulse inside her, releasing his hot load.

They stay like this for a few seconds, before he runs his nose along her jaw, murmuring, “what about you, mamma?” She chuckles softly.

“You can make up for it tomorrow. Right now, I want to cuddle up with the father of my baby and sleep, if that’s okay with you.” He complies to her wish, pulling the covers over them and holding her close. 

 

When he returns to the house the next night, he doesn’t walk in unannounced but knocks instead. When she opens the front door for him, she can see a somewhat large travel bag sitting next to him. The look on his face is something between embarrassment and sheepishness. He takes the bag into his left hand, but lingers at the door step uncertainly. Only when she grabs the collar of his shirt and pulls him first into a fierce kiss and then into the house, does he move. After dinner she unpacks the bag for him and they don’t mention it again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I chose, Eddie not to be dead. He's just too cute to be killed off.
> 
> Kudos and comments are greatly encouraged and appreciated.


	11. A Second

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth and Rio experience a second.

They experience a second a couple of weeks later.

She takes Rio’s money out of the clutter drawer the next week. Carlos has promised her to drive her over to one of the wives today. She insists that they go shopping before. She feels safer not going there empty handed. That is why she drags Carlos to Fine and Frugal before they drive over to the first wife. 

Carlos pushes the cart while Beth chooses what to buy. He is annoyed with her, she can see it in his face. Although, they are on slightly better terms as of lately, he still is a grumpy prick. She is engrossed in her shopping list, making sure to always pick the name brands, not wanting to come across as cheap. Hoping at the same time that it would not seem as if she is trying to buy her forgiveness. When she is standing in the cereal aisle, contemplating which kind of cereal to buy, Carlos suddenly nudges her with his elbow.

“What’s his problem?” he says jutting out his chin to somewhere behind her. She turns around and spots Boomer. She feels uneasy. Annoyed at Boomer and at the same time the hairs at the back of her neck stand on edge. The idiot just doesn’t know when to leave it be. 

“Oh, it’s nothing,” Beth shrugs. “What do you think? Which kind of cereal would she like?” she asks quickly in an attempt to distract him. But, of course, he isn’t distracted. He still fixates Boomer and Beth curses under her breath. Why can’t the idiot just ignore her for once?

“What he do?” Carlos asks, finally taking his eyes of Boomer, fixing her instead.

“You have to promise not to do anything about it, if you want me to tell you,” she tries to negotiate. Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t budge.

“I will do no such thing! What. He. Do?” he asks again, getting more annoyed by the second.

“He’s tried his luck with Annie,” she starts and Carlos snorts at the thought of this loser trying to hit on Annie. Despite the fact, that Carlos is happily married, he isn’t blind and has, of course, noticed that both of the Marks sisters are too hot for their own good. And while Beth is something of a presumptuous bitch that has his boss wrapped around her little finger, especially since she has dropped that kid on him, Annie is different. She is funny, open and honest. And loyal. He doesn’t for one second believe that it was her idea to get his boss locked away. He sees her struggling, with her crappy job and the fact that her dumbass ex-husband has taken her daughter from her, but she was still classy in a way that set her out of Boomer’s league by miles. 

When Beth doesn’t say anything, he nudges her again, “and?”

“He recognized her when we robbed the store and tried to blackmail her afterwards,” she says, trying to navigate around the crude details, knowing full well to whom she is speaking and what he is capable of. 

He raises an eyebrow. “What did he want? Money?” She can tell right away that he knows that Boomer didn’t want money. She just shakes her head.

“He wanted her,” he states, eyebrows drawn together. She gives a small nod.

“Did he force her?”

“He tried. I whacked him with a bottle.” He nods. “Please don’t kill him,” she continues.

“I won’t. Not today anyway,” he answers. At this moment he feels a grudging respect for Beth. A woman who is ready to kill for her sister, even though she unfortunately hasn’t succeeded. That she is trying to repent for her mistakes doesn’t hurt either.

They finish their shopping and Beth is glad that Boomer keeps his distance. Maybe he doesn’t have a death wish after all. But be that as it may, his staring hasn’t gone unnoticed and she isn’t sure she wants to know what Carlos is going to do with the information she has just given him.

They load the trunk of the black sedan with their purchases and drive off towards Luciana, the first wife. 

They arrive at a rundown house in a shady neighborhood. She feels a pang of guilt. Apparently, her actions have cost the kind of people who needed Rio’s business the most. Luciana is probably struggling even more than Beth did after she was out. She opens the door in order to get out of the car. When Carlos makes to open his door as well, her hand comes to rest on his forearm.

“No,” she says softly, “I have to do this on my own.” He sits back and lets her leave the car on her own. She walks around to the trunk and gets the two heavily loaded shopping bags. She walks through the overgrown front yard to the front door and knocks. It takes some time before the door opens. Luciana stands in front of her, one eyebrow raised, looking at her coldly. Well, it seems that Luciana knows exactly who is standing in front of her.

“What do you want?” she asks. Her tone drips of animosity. Beth’s heart sinks, but then again what has she been hoping for? She squares her shoulders, breathes in deeply and speaks.

“I’m sorry to disturb you. My name is Beth...”

“I know who you are! What do you want?” she snaps.

“I wanted to apologize. I’m deeply sorry for the pain I’ve caused you and your family,” she says, looking Luciana in the eyes.

“Oh, so you think that you can just barge in here and apologize and all is fine again? I will invite you in and we have a chat and pour our hearts out to each other?” She laughs bitterly.

“No. I just needed you to know that it’s me who is responsible for your situation.”

“Did that dick Rio send you to clean up his mess?” Beth can see that she is furious. Not only with her.

“No, he doesn’t know I’m here.” She pushes the bags towards her. “I’ve brought some groceries to help out a little. Is there anything else I can do to help you?”

“Just fuck off,” she snaps, taking the bags from her and throwing the door into her face. Beth hasn’t expected their meeting to go any other way. But she wants to help this woman anyway. She needs to do something to repent. She stands in front of the door for a few minutes contemplating her next move. When she looks to the right she spots a few garden tools and in lack of any other idea she takes them and goes to work on the front garden. 

After a few minutes of attacking the weeds in one of the flower beds, Carlos appears by her side.

“Should you be doing this kind of work in your state?” he asks.

“As I keep telling you guys, I’m pregnant not sick. Women have been doing much harder work while pregnant for centuries! You can wait in the car or go home or whatever.” She glances up at him. He has raised his hands apologetically and walks backwards slowly.

“Just, please, pick me up in an hour or two, okay?” she asks softly. He nods and walks back to the car. He doesn’t drive off but waits for her.

She enjoys the hard work and she loves the way she can see the progress that she is making. After about two hours the garden is weed-free and looking even more wimpy than before. She returns the tools to where she has found them earlier and walks back to the car. When she looks back at the house one last time, she can see Luciana looking at her through one of the windows. Beth nods towards her and enters the car.

 

The next day it is Eddie who comes by her house. They drop the kids off at school and when he wants to drive back to her house she stops him and instructs him to drive by the home improvement store. She buys different plants and some grass seeds for Luciana’s garden. After loading the trunk, she makes him drive her to Luciana’s. When she gets out of the car, Eddie follows her. 

“No,” she says, “I want to do this by myself.” But Eddie just shakes his head.

“Do you think I’m just going to sit in the car and be bored to death?” His eyes twinkle and she just cannot refuse him. 

Together they work away. Eddie digs the holes for the plants where Beth tells him to and while she puts them in, covering their delicate roots with earth, he begins sowing on a patch of ground that Beth wants to turn into a small greenfield. When they are finished and Beth wants to get into the car, she looks back to the house. Luciana is looking out of the window again. This time she nods back.

“This was fun,” Eddie quips when they drive off, “what are we going to do tomorrow?” Beth doesn’t answer but just looks at him gratefully. 

 

Meeting the other wives doesn’t go any smoother than with Luciana. Still, she concludes that news has travelled that she is trying to help them out, because when she comes around Camila’s house, she takes the groceries from her and points out a couple of chores that she can tend to. She doesn’t complain but gets to works, glad that she can help.

When she comes by Luciana’s house the next time, bearing groceries, the door opens before she even reaches the front porch. Luciana holds it open for her and she steps inside, setting the bags down on the small dining room table. The inside of the house is rundown but clean. Beth pretends not to notice that they are pretty much living in poverty. Instead she starts unpacking the bags. Luciana stores the groceries away. They do the task quietly and when they are finished they look at each other awkwardly.

“Do you want some lemonade?” Luciana finally asks. And Beth nods gratefully. They go out to the back porch and sit down at a small table. Luciana’s three kids are playing on an old, rusty swing set. They are squealing and laughing and Beth cannot suppress a smile seeing them.

“Do you have kids?” Luciana asks not looking at her.

“Yes, four of them. Two boys and two girls and another on the way,” Beth says warmly, one hand making its way to rest on her stomach, that has started to round out a little.

Luciana raises one surprised eyebrow at her. “Rio’s?” Beth nods. “Wow, I couldn’t picture him with a child if I tried,” Luciana says. Beth snorts.

“I couldn’t either. Until I saw him with mine.” A warm, mushy feeling settles in her stomach at the thought of Rio with her children. It is true that she hadn’t been able to picture him with a child. She had thought that he didn’t care for children and when she told him that she was pregnant, she had expected him to tell her to get rid of it. She would have never taken him for a family guy. And he probably hadn’t either. But after the scene in her bedroom the other night things have changed. She has gotten to know another side of him. He had taken care of her once before, when she had the alleged stomach bug. But she had dismissed it. She thought that he just happened to find her sick and thought that after he had pulled such a dick move on their previous meeting he just kind of felt that he couldn’t leave her like that without exposing himself as the biggest jerk on the planet. But now that she is pregnant and he has kind of moved in (they still haven’t talked about it) and met her children, she saw this caring side of him almost every day.

“Why?” Luciana’s voice shakes her out of her musings. It takes Beth a couple of seconds to register what Luciana has said. She looks at her and then says, “I thought I had to protect them. I thought that he was going to kill me.”

Luciana nods. “I get that. You know, you don’t have to come around anymore. I’m sure you have enough on your plate.”

It takes Beth a few seconds to answer. “Yes sure, but may I come around anyway?”

Luciana frowns at her. Clearly Beth has said something to upset her. “I don’t need your charity.”

“I know you don’t. I can see that your holding up. Your children seem so happy, despite the misery that I have brought over this family. I know that it must be because of you.” They are silent for a few minutes while both are sipping their lemonade from time to time while they are watching the children play a game of tag.

“Rio says that he is going to get arrested sooner or later. He tells me that in his line of business it not a question of if but of when. I would just hope that, in case that he gets locked up, there would be someone I could talk to who understands what kind of life he is living.”

“Have it your way, then,” Luciana says without heat. When Beth makes eye-contact, she smiles a little. 

Over the next few weeks she visits the wives regularly. She tries to help them out any way she can, sometimes she gets the boys to do some repairs around their houses and sometimes they invite her in and they chat. She wouldn’t go so far as to say that they were becoming friends but her visits become less about reparations and more about companionship.

 

Rio comes home around dinner time one evening. The kids happily dig into their spaghetti with ketchup and although Rio looks a little bewildered when Beth puts a plate in front of him, he doesn’t comment. After dinner he helps her clean away the dishes and when it’s time for the kids to go to bed he goes upstairs to bid them goodnight and read Emma her story. When he comes down again, Beth is sitting on the sofa flipping through the channels. He heads into the kitchen and opens the fridge, which is, with the exception of the bottle of ketchup and some cheese, empty.

“No beer?” he calls out towards her.

“Didn’t come around to grocery shopping today, sorry,” she answers quickly.

He joins her on the sofa and they both know that she isn’t fooling him. Still he waits for a few minutes before he talks again, letting her stew. She almost believes that she has gotten away with it, when he finally speaks up.

“What is going on, Elizabeth?” Ugh, the full name. She groans inwardly. There is no kidding around with him, when he uses her full name. Their relationship might have changed since the early days when he was the big bad crime boss and she was the inexperienced housewife constantly screwing up, always lingering between lusting after him and being afraid of him, but she still knows better than to test him when he uses her full name. She looks at him and finds him watching her intently. She blushes under his scrutiny.

“I’m out of money,” she admits, averting her gaze.

“How so?”

“I don’t work at the florist anymore, so there is no money coming in,” she offers, avoiding his question.

“What about the stack of money, I’ve left on the counter for you?” He looks at her with a stern expression on his face that makes her squirm in her seat.  
“I used it on other stuff?” she offers.

“What stuff, Elizabeth?” There it is, the full name again. He is getting impatient with her. She’d better spill her guts now or they would get into a row.

“It felt wrong to use it for myself, so I used it to help out the wives,” she admits, not really sure why she feels like she has done something she shouldn’t have. His gaze softens a little.

“I’ve been wondering why Carlos has stopped bitching about you,” he says and chuckles to himself, before he pulls her close into a tender kiss.

“Leave it to your boys to report every single one of my screw ups, but to not mention this.” She starts smiling herself now. Rio gets his phone out and fires off a couple of texts, before wrapping her in his arms, demanding to hear every last detail about her encounters with the wives. They snuggle up on the sofa and she tells him everything. He strokes her hair while listening intently. When she finishes, he engages her lips into a sweet kiss.

She can feel her body reacting to him. Her back is arching of its own accord in an attempt to increase the contact between their bodies. His hand wanders underneath her shirt, cupping her breast, slowly massaging it. She moans lowly, when his fingers find her nipple and squeeze it deliciously. Their kisses become more urgent and she is pulling at his shirt, when they are interrupted by a knock. Beth startles, not expecting company. He kisses her one last time, before getting the door. Behind it stand Eddie and Annie.

“You called,” Annie says with a slight bow in her best imitation of a servant. It is a sign of how deeply he is entangled in this relationship that he doesn’t raise to the bait, but just chuckles instead.

“Thank you for making the time,” he says. “I see that Eddie has picked you up, how very environmentally conscious of you,” he teases. Annie blushes deep red, but Eddie is oblivious.

“Nah, boss, no problem. I was at Annie’s anyway.” If possible, Annie blushes an even darker shade of red under Beth’s surprised glance. Eddie flops onto the sofa next to Beth, leaning forward and placing a salutatory kiss on her cheek. 

“Watch where you put that mouth, if you like it the way it is,” Rio shoots. Eddie raises his hands apologetically.

“Sorry, boss!” But he doesn’t seem concerned as he grabs for the remote and starts flipping through the channels. 

“Let’s go,” Rio says and Beth gets up, righting her rumbled clothes and walks towards the door. When she passes by Annie, she lifts an inquisitive brow, but Annie quickly averts her eyes.

“Where are we going?”

“Grocery shopping.”

They pass by the two nearest grocery stores and Beth starts wondering where they are going, when Rio pulls onto the parking lot of Fine and Frugal. He chuckles when he sees the confused look on her face. 

“I have a lot of fond memories of this place,” he says, eyes twinkling with mischief. She blushes and admits, “me too.” They make their way inside. Thankfully, Boomer isn’t in.

On their way back home, they stop at a pizza place and pick up a midnight snack. The spaghetti obviously haven’t been to Rio’s taste and she doesn’t blame him.  
They pull up in front of the house and Beth gets out of the car, pizza in hand. When she opens the door, she already hears the commotion before she looks over to the couch, hearing then seeing Annie and Eddie frantically grabbing for their clothes.

She cannot help but laugh. “I’m sorry to disturb you,” she says, heading for the kitchen, giving them space to straighten themselves out and placing the pizza on the counter. “We’ve brought pizza.”

Eddie hurries outside to help Rio, but Annie joins Beth in the kitchen, avoiding her gaze, looking at the floor.

“Spill, Annie,” Beth says in a scandalized whisper.

“There’s nothing to spill,” Annie answers, still not looking at her.

“So, I did not just catch you, having sex on my sofa? My very expensive sofa I might add.” When Annie doesn’t answer, she continues, “why didn’t you tell me?”  
“I don’t know,” Annie answers, blushing again.

“You like him.” It’s not a question. Annie nods. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Beth repeats, in a soft whisper.

“I thought you wouldn’t approve,” answers Annie quietly.

“What? Because he’s a gangster?” Annie nods and all she can do is snort. “Well, that would be a little hypocritical of me, wouldn’t it?”

“Isn’t he just the latest link in a chain of losers?” What is going on with her sister? She has never been shy about the guys she has dated. And some of them really have been losers, Gregg being the exception, but even he only got his act together after he and Annie had already broken up. Then again, the question arises what constitutes someone as a winner or loser. Money in the bank and a big house or sleeping with your ex-wife while simultaneously doing IVF with your new wife. 

“Do _you_ think so?” she asks softly. Annie shakes her head. And then it dawns on Beth. This was serious. Annie was serious about Eddie. All the other guys were just passing through, sometimes she didn’t even remember their names after a few months. 

“You’re in love with him,” Beth states and pulls her sister into a hug.

“Who’s in love with whom?” Rio’s voice travels into the kitchen from the front door. Annie tenses in her arms.

“I am. With you,” she calls out before pulling Annie close and whispering in her ear, “I’m happy for you!” Annie smiles at her, kissing her on the cheek. Beth can see that a weight has lifted from her shoulder. 

“Why is everyone kissing my woman tonight?” Rio asks when he comes into the kitchen bearing their purchases. Eddie follows closely behind. Beth starts sorting the groceries into the fridge while the others happily munch away on the pizza. Eddie and Annie stay for another hour and it is fun to have them. She can see that Annie is happy, joking and laughing, carefree. Beth enjoys the sight of it. Her little sister has been through so much, it makes her angry that everything hasn’t worked out smoothly in her life, because how could she ever want anything else for her little sister? But apparently, people were right when they said, everything happens for a reason, because for all the shit they have been through, at this moment they are both pretty happy with how things have turned out for them.

Soon it becomes clear that they want to leave. They are giving each other heated gazes and they sneak in the odd kiss and caress when they think Beth and Rio aren’t watching. Rio is off to the bathroom, when Beth clears the pizza dishes away. When she turns back she catches them making out in earnest. She clears her throat and they jump apart.

“I think we should go,” Annie says, blushing again.

“Yes, that might be best,” Eddie adds. They hurriedly grab their stuff and make for the door. Beth accompanies them hugging her sister and then Eddie. She pulls him close for a second and whispers in his ear, loud enough for Annie to hear, “if you hurt my little sister, I’ll have my man castrate you!” She presses kiss on his cheek, laughing about his astonished face.

She closes the door behind them and turns around, intending to walk back to the sofa, but she collides with a solid mass. She looks up into Rio’s face and can see that is face is lit with amusement.

“I’m not sure I want to castrate anyone,” he says chuckling. “I could maybe knee cap him, if that’s okay with you.” He bends down a little, kisses her deeply and then swoops her up in his arms, carrying her up the stairs bridal style. 

 

When Eddie returns to her house to look out for her while Rio is working, he is in a foul mood. He doesn’t hug her or kiss her on the cheek, in fact he doesn’t even say Hello when he walks in. Beth is somewhat worried to see his normal sunny demeanor change so rapidly, something must be very wrong. Her first instinct is that something has happened to Rio, her heart is in her throat instantly, she feels herself sway while panic is rising inside of her.

“Is he okay?” she wheezes.

“Who? Rio?” he asks distracted. “Yes, sure, he’s fine.”

“Annie?” She has to sit down.

“Depends on how you look at it,” he growls. Beth doesn’t understand what he is talking about and the way he is acting doesn’t help her panic one bit. He lifts his gaze, fury blazing in his eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell me about that bastard boss of hers?” he spits. And then it dawns on her, Eddie has found out about Boomer trying to rape Annie.

“Well, it isn’t my story to share,” she says softly, reaching out for him, but he quickly leans backwards out of her reach.

“You didn’t have any reservations to share it with Carlos,” he accuses.

“That grumpy prick! He’s told you? What is it with you guys that you cannot keep a single piece of information to yourselves?”

“I have a right to know!” he snaps.

“No, you don’t. Not unless she chooses to tell you herself,” she says firmly. He jumps up from the chair, tipping it backwards and grinds out furiously, “I have a right to know about my woman’s past!”

Beth flinches back a little and just like that she can suddenly tell how he is able to intimidate people, after all. But she is going to stand her ground. “Why?” she asks raising her eyebrows. “Wouldn’t want a soiled girlfriend, would you?” she accuses, with an edge to her voice.

“I... He... What?” He blinks at her. “What did you just say?” His hands fly to his back, getting out his gun. Beth’s hands fly into the air when he points the gun at her. Beth silently thanks god that the kids are with Dean today and aren’t in any danger of seeing of this. “How dare you!?” he spits, fixing her.

“Sorry! I’m sorry. Okay?” she splutters and he slowly drops the gun on the table. She walks over to him, pushes the gun out of his reach and wraps him in a tight hug. “I’m sorry,” she says again, this time in a whisper. When she releases him, he picks up the chair and sits down heavily. All fight seems to have drifted out of him, leaving him exhausted. He rubs his hands over his face and looks at her defeated.

“I’m going to kill that motherfucker,” he says.

“No, you’re not,” she answers softly.

“Fuck yes, I am,” he snaps back.

“He isn’t worth the trouble.”

“How can you even say that? Annie is your sister.” Wow, that stings. 

“I know that. Did Carlos tell you that I whacked him with a bottle? I was ready to kill him myself! But neither Annie, nor I want to see you getting into trouble over this piece of shit.” Now it is her time to snap at him. How dare he insinuate that she wasn’t ready to kill to save her sister. Hell, she would give her life for her.  
They don’t talk after their little butt of heads. It is only when he receives some text that he speaks again.

“Would you mind not telling Rio that I got my gun out today?” She can see that he is still upset, but she can understand how he is feeling. And she can appreciate the intensity with which he cares for her sister. 

“I won’t breath a word,” she says softly. “Please don’t do anything stupid. Annie would be crushed, if she lost you.” He gives her a pained look, just as Rio walks through the front door.

“What’s going on here?” he asks. Eddie takes his eyes off Beth and nods towards Rio, before leaving the house. Rio looks after him, puzzled.

“What happened?” he asks and looks at Beth. When she doesn’t answer, he walks over to her, grabbing her shoulders. “Has he tried something with you?” Beth cannot help but laugh at him making all the wrong assumptions.

“No, he hasn’t. He has found out something about Annie that he didn’t like.” He groans and rolls his eyes.

“What has she done?”

“Oh, it isn’t about what she has done so much as what has been done to her,” Beth answers. When he shoots her an inquisitive glance, she knows that she has to share the story that isn’t hers to share for a second time.

“You remember Boomer? Annie’s boss at Fine and Frugal?” He nods. “When we first robbed the store, he recognized her and tried to blackmail her into having sex with him. When she refused him, he tried to rape her.” Rio groans and pulls her into his arms. He kisses her tenderly, then says, “Looks like I’ll have to castrate someone after all.”

They stay in their embrace for a few seconds, before Rio pulls away. “I have to go after him,” he says. “Call her over. She’ll spend the night here. I don’t know when I’ll be back.” He kisses her again and makes for the door. She doesn’t even try to argue, knowing full well that they are going to do what they have to do.

“Be careful!” she calls after him and he nods, before closing the door behind himself.

 

“Fuck!” Annie says after Beth has told her the whole story.

“I’m so sorry!”

“For what? You didn’t do anything.” Annie reaches out for her, taking her hand.

“I shouldn’t have said anything to Carlos.”

“Oh, come on. The guy is fucking terrifying. I would have spilled my guts in a heartbeat.” She gives Beth a weak smile. 

“Fucking pregnancy. I could really use a drink right now.” They share a strained laugh. Annie gets up fetches the bourbon from the kitchen. Just because her sister cannot drink, doesn’t mean that she can’t either. 

They sit in silence. After a while Beth turns on the TV, but none of them can concentrate enough to follow. Every few minutes one of them switches to a local news channel, checking if whatever they have done has hit the media yet. It is getting later and later and still there is no sign of them. Around three o’clock they retreat to the bedroom. Although Beth has prepared the guest room for her sister, they still cuddle up together in her bed. The worry doesn’t let her sleep. She stares at the ceiling running every scenario she can think of through her head. She knows that Annie isn’t sleeping either, but they do not talk. 

Around half past four, she hears the front door open. They both sit bolt upright. Quickly they throw some clothes on and hurry down the stairs. When they arrive downstairs, Rio is helping Eddie into a chair in the dining room. To say that he looks bad would be an understatement. While Rio looks his regular self, Eddie’s hands and face are badly bruised, his lip is split and his left eye is almost swollen shut. There is a lot of blood on him and Beth is sure that not all of it is his.

“Oh my god,” Annie whispers and pushes past Beth towards Eddie. Her hands fly to his face, checking his injuries. She proceeds to grab his hands, checking on them, but he pulls them from her, grabbing her and pulling her into a fierce and surely very painful kiss. 

“Are you okay?” Beth asks, looking at Rio. He looks tired but nods. “Are you in trouble?” He shakes his head and pulls her to him, kissing her tenderly.

Annie walks into the downstairs bathroom to get the first aid kit and starts addressing Eddie’s wounds.

“Is there anything I can do to help,” Beth asks.

“No,” Annie answers. “Go to bed. You look exhausted.” Beth lingers for a few seconds before Rio pulls her upstairs. Once in the bedroom they undress and snuggle together.

“What happened?” Beth asks.

“Do you really want to know?”

“Probably not. Tell me anyway,” she whispers.

“It was brutal,” he says, pulling her close, one hand playing with her hair. “We tracked him down and brought him to one of the warehouses. Eddie could have ended it pretty quickly, but he dragged it out. Letting him get in punch after punch. After a few hours the bastard was bleeding like a pig and I told Eddie to end it already. I thought he was going to shoot him or strangle him or something, but he just kept on punching the guy until he didn’t move anymore and then some. I had to drag him off, nearly earning myself a couple of punches in the progress.”

Beth doesn’t know what to say. She knows what they are capable of. She hasn’t turned him in to the Feds for nothing. Still she is shocked, even though she knows that he hasn’t told her half of it. 

“What now?” Beth manages after a second of silence.

“Carlos is cleaning up right now. He will dispose of the body.” She doesn’t ask and she doesn’t want to know. She hears Annie and Eddie climb the stairs and walk over to the guest room and close the door behind themselves.

“I was scared you wouldn’t come back,” she whispers. “You took so long. I thought the cops got you.”

He turns her head towards himself and kisses her. Her body reacts instantly. His tongue slides over her bottom lip and she moans into his mouth. He pulls back and whispers against her lips, “I’m sorry.” He is about to kiss her again, when they suddenly hear the headboard of the guest bed connecting with the wall rhythmically. She giggles and Rio can’t keep a straight face either.

“How is that even humanly possible?” she asks between fits of laughter.

“Shhh...,” he places finger to her lips, “let him have this one. He’s going to be out cold for the next two days.” But they both can’t reign in their quiet laughter. “You know, we could always...” He wriggles his eyebrows suggestively, eyes dropping to her lips.

“Eww!” she squeals, hitting him on the arm. “I refuse to be turned on by my sister’s sex life!” He snorts and they both laugh for a couple of minutes, unable to stop themselves. But they are both exhausted and as soon as the banging of the headboard has ceased they fall asleep.

 

Rio is right. Eddie sleeps nearly two days straight. Annie stays with them for the time it takes Eddie to recover. Although, Rio is sure that they aren’t in any trouble, Beth checks the local news hourly, worrying about them. But even after two days there is nothing. 

When Eddie is awake again, he can barely move. His face looks even worse now shining in every color on the spectrum. Annie tries to get him to see a doctor, but he insists that he is just sore and will soon be better. 

After about a week two things happen. For one Boomer’s body is found. The news say that it was a mugging gone wrong and that there are no suspects. They go on lamenting increasing crime rates in the poorer parts of town and Beth has never been more grateful for her hometown’s decline. 

At the same time Rio gets annoyed with Annie and Eddie still staying at their house. Although, they have been getting it on, Beth has been denying Rio any sexual contact, because it just felt too weird. He returns home one evening calling for the kids. They bounce down the stairs, happy to see him.

“How do you feel about a night at your father’s?” he asks, gaining himself a quizzical look from Beth. They squeal with delight. No matter how much they enjoy spending time with Rio, Dean is still their father and Beth wouldn’t have it any other way. He holds the front door open for them and they run to the car. Before he follows them, he fixes Eddie with a cold stare. “When I’m back, you’d better be gone or I will shoot you. You feel me?” He slams the door shut behind him. Beth and Annie snort with laughter, but they pack up their stuff anyway. 

When Beth accompanies them to the door, she hugs them both goodbye. 

“Sorry for overstaying our welcome,” says Annie.

“No, it was good to have you around. He's just grumpy because he didn't get any,” Beth answers, squeezing her sister’s hand and winking at ger. “You too, Eddie. I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

 

When Rio returns home, Beth is in the bedroom looking at herself in the full-size mirror. She has put on a set of black lacey lingerie, knowing full well what was on Rio’s mind. The second he spots her in front of the mirror a strained groan leaves his throat. The slight curve of her belly, caused by his baby in there, makes her even more beautiful than before.

She turns around and smiles at him. Openly and honest, glad that he is there, looking forward to whatever he has planned for her and the thought that anyone could ever love him that way, even after what he did just a week ago, nearly makes him come in his pants.

He walks over to her and pulls her close, kissing her deeply. He stirs her towards the bed and gently lowers her onto it. She watches him through her lashes as he pulls her panties down and without further ado he trails kisses from her knees to her center. His kisses are urgent. He circles her clit with his tongue, slightly sucking it into his mouth. At the same time, he moves two fingers in and out of her. She knows that he cannot wait to bury himself inside of her, but he is still too much of a gentleman to not make her come at least once before. When she feels her orgasm approach, she doesn’t fight it. She was just as desperate to feel him and there was still enough time to drag it out on their second go. One last flick of his tongue over her aching clit and she shatters into a thousand piece, his name on her lips.

She barely has time to recover before he places his erect cock at her entrance. He thrusts into her in one swift motion, stilling when he is fully sheathed, giving her a second to adjust to him. The need to move overwhelms him rapidly, when he hasn’t been able to touch her for so long. He pulls almost all the way out and thrusts back in with vigor. He soon settles into a vicious pace that leaves her breathless with the need to come again. That is when he sneaks his hand between them and starts gently massaging her clit again. It doesn’t take long until she is sent over the edge for a second time and he follows suit, collapsing on top of her.  
“Oh mamma, I needed this,” he says gruffly. She chuckles and kisses him sloppily. Already she can feel his cock twitching to attention again and she knows that they will be at it for some time. She breathes a contented sigh, feeling carelessly happy to have him in her arms.

 

The alarm comes too soon the next morning. She groans, feeling sore from all they have done last night. But the prospect of the day lets her get out of bed and walk into the shower. Once she is finished she walks back into the bedroom. Rio hasn’t stirred, yet. She crawls towards him and kisses him awake.

“Come on. We have an important day ahead of us,” she says softly. Then goes downstairs to prepare some breakfast for them. When Rio comes downstairs, they eat quickly and then drive towards the clinic.

When she looks over at him, she can see he is nervous. “What’s up, honey,” she asks. He lifts one eyebrow at the use of the nickname. She cannot fight a smile, apparently, he was the only one allowed to use nicknames. 

“It’s just my first ultrasound,” he says.

“You will be glad to know, that you are not actually getting an ultrasound,” she teases.

“Stop mocking me!” he snaps, but laughs anyway.

They drive to the same clinic that Beth has been to before. Marcia is happy to see her again and congratulates her on her decision to keep the baby.

In the doctor’s office Beth climbs onto the examination bed with little problems, already dreading having to climb up there during the later stages of her pregnancy. Rio sits on a stool to her left, holding her hand, while Marcia stands to her right, working the machine. Marcia seems to sense that he doesn’t have a clue about ultrasounds because she takes a lot of time explaining every little detail to him and is rewarded with an awed look. When he sees the first outlines of his child appear on the monitor his eyes go wide with wonder. For Beth it is almost more enjoyable to watch him than the monitor. But she is just as excited to see her baby again. This time in a whole different mindset than the last time. When Marcia finds the heartbeat, Rio’s face breaks into a smile and he kisses the palm of her hand gently.

“Do you want to know the sex?” Marcia asks. Beth shakes her head, while Rio nods. Marcia chuckles. “Well, it’s one way or the other. You have to tell me.” 

Beth looks over at Rio and he gives her a pleading look. “Oh, fine,” she huffs. “Tell us.”

“It’s going to be a little girl,” Marcia almost sings. Beth looks over at Rio who has buried his face into his hands, while Marcia is wiping her stomach clean of the ultrasound jelly. 

“I’m going to leave that up for you. Be right back,” Marcia says, leaving the screen to show their baby. Beth is still looking at Rio unsure of what to say. She is overjoyed by the idea of having another girl and also quite impressed with him for predicting it. Although, it has been just a fifty-fifty chance. She glances back at the screen, when she hears Rio’s muffled voice.

“I hate you for doing this to me.” She is shocked into silence. All the doubts that she has had about their relationship come rushing back to her in an instance. Doesn’t he want this – her? – after all? Has he just been playing along because he thought it was the right thing to do? She blinks back tears, biting down on her bottom lip hard. In lack of anything to say, she tries to make light of the situation, trying to keep her hurt feelings out of her voice.

“No, you don’t!” He lifts his head and she can see that his eyes are brimming with tears. She has made him cry for a second time.

“No, I really don’t,” he says, one tear spilling down his cheek. “I love you!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my original vision of how I wanted the story to end. Now I'm not so sure. I might write an epilogue. Maybe there are things that you still need to know about them. Let me know.


	12. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank everyone who has read the story through to the end. I want to especially thank everyone who left kudos or comments, they really made my days. I loved hearing what you thought of my story. 
> 
> I am so very glad that there are people out there who have actually enjoyed this. 
> 
> So here comes the epilogue. Enjoy.

He finds it hard to believe that Ria has been home for one month already. It’s funny how so much has changed. Suddenly there is something more important than business. And he is holding it in his arms right now. She pulls the funniest faces, getting to know all those muscles in her face that she has been unaware of up until now. When she is awake, which is not too often during the day when he was completely honest, she moves about constantly. Stretching and retracting her little fingers, holding onto his, if he offered. Kicking her little feet, throwing her head around, having little control over her body just as if drunk. And that smell. No one ever told him that someone could smell this good. He has been in love with her from the second he first held her. How could he not be, when she is the most perfect thing, he has ever laid eyes on. It doesn’t hurt that she looks like him, as people like to tell him. Beth says it’s some cavemen survival relict that’s supposed to keep him from killing her. When she first said it, he had only raised an eyebrow at her and chuckled. She was obviously jealous. But even though she couldn’t, he saw her inside his daughter as well. 

He remembers the day she was born. Beth had been cranky for weeks, not being able to move the way she wanted, heartburn radiating to her knees, needing to pee every five seconds, and feeling fat and unattractive. He tried, time and time again, to assure her that she was gorgeous, but she just didn’t want to listen. And she had been gorgeous; she looked like some serious fertility goddess. He had made her his breakfast or dinner whenever she’d let him. Which wasn’t too often towards the end of her pregnancy. But he could also see what the pregnancy was taking out of her and he tried to help as much as possible. The boys had been instructed to keep coming to the house when he was working and were specifically ordered to help her as much as they could. Problem was, of course, that this stubborn woman wasn’t having it. She kept telling them how women had had it so much worse than her for centuries and centuries. It might be a cliché that women go crazy during pregnancy, he muses, but for her it was true. But she was entitled to, she grew his baby in her belly after all.

Carlos had the nerve to bitch about her being mad in his presence once. He had fixed him with an icy look, taken out his gun, aimed it at his head for a few seconds, before releasing a shot, that hit the floor about half an inch from his left foot. He hadn’t had any complaints thereafter. 

They had sat on the sofa, watching The Bachelorette, him massaging her feet, when she had sat bolt upright, frowning in pain. It had taken him some time to realize what was going on. He kept asking what was going on until the contraction faded and she told him. He was on his feet within a second, getting her hospital bag, that stood packed in the bedroom and he was already half way out the door, when he realized he was missing something... Beth. She was still sitting on the sofa watching the program as if nothing had happened. How was he supposed to know that labor could take a while? In the movies women always needed to be rushed to hospital. He stored this fact away together with overly-explosive cars and detonations in space. 

She had told him to get some sleep and that she would wake him when it was time to leave. But he couldn’t. He stayed by her side until she told him to call over Annie and Eddie to watch after the kids while they were in the hospital. That had been around 3 a.m. and he had thought that he surely would hold his daughter in his arms before daybreak. Well he didn’t.

Annie and Eddie arrived at the house in record time, both sleepy. In the rush to get there Eddie had put on one of Annie’s shirts that ended a couple of inches above the waistband of his pants. Although, Beth told them to go to bed, they refused and cuddled together on the sofa. It didn’t take them ten minutes to fall asleep, despite their vows to stay awake until they left. It was another hour before Beth announced that it was finally time to go. Her contractions came regularly now and when they arrived they were brought into the delivery room immediately. He felt so out of place, unable to think of anything helpful he could contribute. He kept asking her all kinds of questions, offering her ice chips, backrubs, you name it. It wasn’t until she told him to “shut the fuck up” that he calmed down a little. He took a seat next to her hospital bed and held her hand, kissing it from time to time, stroking her hair, murmuring to her how incredible she was. And she seriously was. Cracking jokes in between contraction and everything. If he hadn’t already been head over heels in love with her, this would have done the trick. It was awe inspiring to see how hard she was working to bring their daughter into the world.

Around 2 p.m. he finally held her in his arms. “You did it,” he said, eyes wide, when he laid her on Beth’s chest. He cried a few very manly tears and Beth said, “you’re such a big old softie,” smiling up at him with nothing but love in her eyes. He bent down to kiss her forehead. They sat together for a while, looking down at their perfect daughter both of them beyond overwhelmed at what they had created. 

Beth is asleep upstairs. She is exhausted, because the little devil has kept her awake for most of last night. Beth says she’s gassy and that it’s normal for newborns. He doesn’t know anything about it, but chooses to believe her. She’s the one with the experience in this field, so who is he to doubt her. 

He has gotten his wish to name her after his grandmother. Although Beth first thought it weird to pick a name so close to his. He told her that he was the kind of man full enough of himself to name his child after himself even if it was a girl. She had laughed at him and he had laughed with her. In the end he had gotten his way, so he could take her ridicule. Although Beth doesn’t call her Ria, nor Maria, but Mary most of the time. He doesn’t mind. 

Ria begins to stir restlessly, he changes her position in his arms so that her head is against his shoulder, walking up and down the living room to sooth her.

“Shush, baby girl, don’t wake your mamma,” he says softly, but to no avail. He knows that Beth is awake at the first sound that leaves her little throat. Still he tries to calm her down. It only takes Beth a minute to appear by his side. She looks disheveled, hair tousled, mascara smudged, bathrobe hanging open from her shoulders. He still thinks that she is beautiful. 

“She’s probably hungry,” she says and takes her from his arms. “Hi beautiful, are you hungry?” With Ria in her arms she retreats to the sofa and proceeds to feed her. Rio walks over to her and kisses her on the head, then he starts to clean up the place as they are expecting some family and friends to celebrate one month of Ria. As soon as Ria is down, Beth gets up to help him. He walks up to her while she is loading the dishwasher and wraps his arms around her from behind. She straightens up, leaning her head backwards so that it falls against his shoulder. He kisses her cheek, breathes her in and whispers against her temple, “go back to bed, mamma. I’ve got this.”

She sighs contentedly. “Have I told you that I love you lately?”

“You might have mentioned it. But no matter how often you say it, it never gets old.” He kisses her again softly.

“Anyway, Annie comes by in an hour, I’m going to let her do the majority of the work.” The smile is audible in his voice and Beth snorts, before turning in his arms and kissing him square on the mouth this time. He kisses her back, deepening the kiss for a second, before he groans into her mouth at the touch of their tongues. He breaks the kiss then. 

“You’re killing me, Elizabeth,” he grinds out. His cock has sprung to full attention already. It has been a while, Beth has not been cleared to have sex yet and neither has she shown any interest so far. He is somewhat touch starved and very horny. But he also doesn’t want to push her and if that means no tongue then so be it.

She smiles at him, eyes twinkling mischievously, apparently very much aware of his state. “How about I suck you off before I take that nap?” she asks sweetly, cheeks flushed, looking as hot as ever, despite her disheveled state. 

Sometimes he cannot believe his own luck and he is not about to push it, so he pecks her on the cheek quickly before bolting upstairs. She smiles at him as she enters the bedroom and spots him already sitting on the bed, bottom half naked. She puts the baby monitor on the nightstand and walks over to him, getting on her knees in front of him. The sight alone has him ready to combust. He bites down on his bottom lip hard to keep from spilling himself like an untouched school boy, before she has even started. She teases him, running her hands over his thighs, touching him everywhere except where he needs her the most. Within a few seconds his thighs are trembling and that is when she takes mercy on him. She runs her lips along the underside of his cock, before letting her tongue swipe over its head. And then she takes him into her mouth, working the base of his cock with her hand while teasing the top with her lips and tongue. She hums against him the way she knows he likes it, the vibrations making his hips jerk. He can feel his orgasm approaching, his balls tightening, and he would have been embarrassed if he wasn’t too far gone already. It only takes about thirty seconds, a slight increase of suction and two swipes of her tongue across the head of his cock, before he comes down her throat, her name on his lips. He slumps back onto the bed, eyes closed. “God, I needed that,” he groans in a post-orgasmic haze.

“I figured as much,” she answers and crawls up next to him, cuddling against his side. He turns onto his side towards her and pulls her close, kissing her deeply, tasting himself on her tongue. He buries his face in her hair and they both doze off within seconds.

When he wakes up again about half an hour later, Beth is sleeping peacefully. He entangles himself from Beth as slowly as possible so as not to wake her. Then he grabs the duvet and pulls it around her. On his way downstairs, he takes the baby monitor, hoping that Ria will grant her mamma at least a couple of hours of sleep.

He hears Annie on the porch even before he makes it all the way downstairs. So, he goes over to the front door and opens it, peeking his head outside. “Why didn’t you just come in?” he asks. She sits on that ridiculous swing that he’s been laughing at ever since he first came here to get his stolen money back.

“I saw that Ria was asleep in her cot and I didn’t see you anywhere, so I figured you were asleep as well. I still remember what it’s like with newborn at home.” She makes to stand from the swing but when she spots him walking over to her, she slumps back. They sit in amicable silence for a while. 

“Sooo,” she begins, “how’s it going?” He snorts.

“Nah, I’m not gonna to talk to you about this.” It is her time to snort now.

“Scared to lose your street your street cred, when I spread the word that your nothing but a big old softie?” she teases.

“Something like that,” he says and winks at her. “Actually, I am trying to procrastinate a little longer before I have to start cleaning in there.” Annie barks a laugh, but doesn’t get up. Seems like he isn’t the only one who doesn’t want to clean.

“How’s it going for you?” he asks after a couple of minutes of silence.

“Same old, same old,” she answers cheerily. But Rio sees straight through her and raises an inquisitive eyebrow at her. She avoids his gaze. “Everything is fine really.”

“Sadie is still with Greg, isn't she?” he says gently. She nods sadly before getting up.

“Let’s get started on that cleaning,” she says and enters into the house. He silently curses himself for starting on Sadie, because now he has to get up from the ridiculous swing. 

They work away in silence for an hour or so, before Ria starts stirring. He’s by her side within a second and picks her up, glad to skip on the housework. He entertains her on the couch while Annie finishes up. Around 3 o’clock he makes his way upstairs to wake Beth so she has time to take a shower before everyone arrives. She is still encased in the duvet, her face is slack, lips slightly parted and her chest is slowly rising and then falling again. She looks so peaceful that it takes him a minute to take a heart and do it. He bends down and kisses her cheek. Her eyelids flutter and she stretches like a cat, inhaling deeply and smiling up at him seductively. 

“Stop that, woman,” he growls against her lips, before kissing her.

“Sorry,” she quips when he pulls away.

“Get ready! The guests arrive in an hour.”

He goes downstairs and starts whipping up some salads and dips with Annie’s help. And then the doorbell rings and the guests start arriving. Eddie arrives first and the second he enters he is all over Annie, leaving him to do all the hosting duties by himself. He is glad when Ruby arrives with her kids and she starts helping him. Stan isn’t with her, apparently, they still haven’t made up. She tries her best to look cheerful, but he can see straight through her. He feels for her. You cannot go around shooting people in the feet on his behalf without getting into his good graces. But there is nothing he can do to help her make things better with her husband.

Carlos arrives fashionably late, together with his wife Sofia and their six-year-old son Mateo. “Uncle Rio,” he squeals and runs into his arms. Rio bends down and picks him up. 

“Hey, little man,” he says, twirling him around, making him screech with laughter. He ruffles his hair before setting him down. “The others are in the garden. Get out there quickly, Emma has already been asking about you.” He wriggles his eyebrows at him, making Mateo blush a little, before he runs outside at top speed. 

Beth comes downstairs then and Rio’s mouth suddenly runs dry. She is wearing a low-cut blue dress that shows off way more of her breasts than should be legal. She obviously notices him staring at her because she gives him an uncertain look as she walks over to him.

“Is this dress okay?” she asks uncertainly. “I feel like a cow…” she trails off, fumbling with her dress. He steps closer to her, running his hands up and down her arms tenderly. She is obviously feeling self-conscious about presenting her post baby body in that dress, although he doesn’t really see why. If you asked him, he’d say that she’s even hotter now than before Ria. Damn, those boobs!

“No, it really it not,” he drawls in a low and seductive voice. “I might have to drag you upstairs and do a number of indecent things to you that will leave the dress ruined.” She blushes, when she meets his eyes and smiles at him, before kissing him on the cheek and joining the guests.

They sit around the large table in the back garden while Rio prepares their food on the barbeque. Beth tries to engage in the conversation, he can see that her laughter is strained and that she is still squirming around in her chair, feeling uncomfortable in her dress and in her body. As soon as the first load of food is distributed, he quickly darts upstairs and fetches one of his hoodies for her.

“You look a little cold,” he says, wrapping her in his hoodie and kissing her on top of her head. She looks up at him, giving him a relieved smile. He can see her releasing a breath and finally relax. 

The afternoon continues pleasantly. They eat and talk and laugh. Everybody gets a chance to hold Ria, only when she starts fussing is she handed over to Beth again. When they are all full and the dishes are cleared away, Rio sits down with the others. Carlos hands Ria over to him and he bounces her a little, watching her suckle on her pink pacifier peacefully. He tunes out the conversation around him and is soon lost in thought. He is shaken out of his musings by Emma who is squealing on the swing while Mateo pushes her. He picks up his beer and takes a sip.

“Higher, Mateo,” Emma squeals.

“I can do this all day, mamma,” Mateo answers smoothly and Rio bursts out laughing, spitting his beer all over the place in the process. All heads have turned towards the two kids on the swing set. 

“Oh my god,” Annie shrieks in between bouts of laughter. She is holding her stomach and wiping at her eyes. Beth however has remained unfazed. She fixes Carlos with an icy glare and says, “Control your boy, Carlos. I swear to god!” When his eyes widen a little, she cannot hide her smile any longer and starts to snicker. 

“It’s not my fault that you Marks women are apparently into bad boys,” he says and chuckles a little.

“Oh, we’re not,” Beth says, waving his comment off with a dismissive hand gesture.

“Excuse me,” Ruby drawls. “May I draw your attention to exhibit A over here,” she continues, gesturing towards Annie and Eddie who have tuned out of the conversation already. She has pulled him close by the collar of his shirt and is alternately whispering in his ears and kissing him, totally oblivious to the situation. “Maybe you want to shift your attention to exhibit B as well, currently in possession of crucial evidence.” They all start laughing again. 

Their guests leave when the sun starts to set. Ruby and Annie stay behind for a while, helping Beth clean up, while Rio and Ria nap on the sofa. When they are finished, Beth hugs them goodbye and then ushers the children upstairs. The boys now have a small TV in their bedroom and she sets the sleep timer to one hour. Then she goes over into Emma’s and Jane’s room and reads them their story. Jane might have complained about being too old for bedtime stories, but Beth told her that as long as she didn’t add a new room to the house with her own hands, she had to live with the stories for Emma still needed them and she had gotten them for as long as she needed them as well. Just like each and every one of her children was read to for as long as they wanted to hear it, and just like it would be for Ria. 

When they are settled in, she walks over to the bedroom and gets Rio’s present out of the bottom drawer of her night stand. She has to take a couple of boxes out before she can reach the thick envelope. Downstairs again she lifts a drooling Ria from his chest and puts her into the small cot that stands next to the sofa. He wakes up the second the warm bundle leaves his chest. He sits up and makes room for her on the sofa. He notices the envelope she has in her hand and raises a questioning eyebrow.

“I have something for you,” she says cheerfully. Up until now he didn’t know that there still would be present even one month after the baby was born. They’ve got their share of presents when they brought Ria home. And sure, he has bought a pair of very expensive diamond earrings for Beth, she has brought his daughter into the world after all. She holds out the envelope to him and he takes it, letting his fingertips slide over the thick, ivory colored parchment.

“What is this, Elizabeth?” he asks, smiling. He knows that when it comes to him she can rarely keep a secret. He always gets her to spill her guts, when he uses her full name. She bites her lip, uncertain what to say. But he doesn’t budge, he’d rather hear what she’s got him than read it on a piece of paper. She huffs a little, then blows a strand of hair out of her face before she starts to speak.

“I ordered a paternity test, when we went to the hospital last time,” she says, smiling at him shyly. He knows this is on him, even as the rage starts rushing into his systems, fogs his brain and courses through his veins. He stands up from the sofa, getting a couple of steps between himself and her and starts pacing.

“So, I guess that my toothbrush didn’t fall into the toilet after all,” he snarls in a low voice. She is taken aback, he can see. 

“I… I thought,” she stammers, clearly unsure what she should say and uncomprehending of what she has done wrong. And he shouldn’t be this angry, but he just can’t calm himself down right now.

“I don’t even know what to say right know,” he snaps, not looking at her, feeling guilty and furious at the same time. It takes all of his self-control not to scream at her.

“Open it,” she says hesitantly. “It says that… “ He cuts her off with a raised hand.

“I don’t care!” he shouts, finally losing control, and rips the envelope in half. Ria starts crying immediately and Beth hurries over to her, picking her up, trying to calm her again.

“I gotta get out of here,” he says and slams the door on his way out. He gets into his car and drives off still fuming. He knows this is on him, but no matter how often he tells himself that, the fury doesn’t seem to dissipate. He drives around in an attempt to calm himself and replays the events that have let to this situation in his head.

About three months ago they got into a row. The most serious one they have had since the aftermath of Fine and Frugal the Second. Dean had come over to pick up the kids. He can’t remember why but he and Beth had ended up on the porch watching the children play in the garden. Rio had made himself sparse, nothing has changed even now, he can’t stand Car Man. So, he went upstairs and sulked in Kenny’s and Danny’s room, watching TV on their tiny set. He had felt stupid and after about half an hour he went downstairs after all. He grabbed a beer from the fridge and went outside to join them. He didn’t take one for Car Man and Beth was obviously in no state to drink. As soon as he opened the door, he could hear Car Man laughing and talking cheerfully.

“Do you remember when we put this thing up?” He laughed, wiping his eyes. “I worked the whole weekend through and just when I was about to add the last piece…”

“The whole thing came crashing down,” she completed his sentence, laughing herself. 

“I swear, I saw my life flashing before my eyes,” he chuckled.

“You’re such a drama queen,” she said and shoved him playfully. Their little exchange cut through him like a knife. He suddenly realized that Beth had had a whole life before she even knew him. It hurt and hurt is not something he takes well. It helped that Car Man’s face fell the second he saw Rio step out onto the porch. Beth’s head whipped around. He didn’t even have to say anything. Beth tried to get out of her chair, struggling due to her swollen belly. He laid a hand on her shoulder, pushing her into her chair gently.

“Common kids, time to go,” he called out with all the self-control he could muster at this moment. The kids came running, excited to spend the weekend at their father’s. Car Man got up quickly, muttered a good-bye and off they went. Rio flopped down in a chair next to Beth and put his feet onto the chair across from him. They sat in silence for a few minutes, before Beth spoke.

“That was not very nice.”

“Who cares?” He fixed her with an angry stare. 

“I do,” she snapped and this time she held her ground. He knew then and he knows now that she tries to avoid getting into rows with him. She knows that he is used to getting his way and that people normally don’t second guess him. She also knows that she has him in the palm of her hand and that he would do as she says any day of the week. She tries to make it easier on him, but not that day. She was pissed off and she wasn’t backing down. They got into a spectacular fight and while his voice remained calm and deadly, she screamed at him and broke a couple of plates in the process. And then he said something stupid. Because she didn’t get it, she didn’t get how it ate him up that she had had this whole life before him that he hadn’t been a part of, that she had been happy with someone else before him, and at that moment he just wanted to hurt her back, to make her get a glimpse of what he was feeling. And that was when it slipped out. “If it’s even my baby…”

She kicked him out then. He regretted his words instantly and he tried to say something, but the look in her eyes shut him up. He went to his house but couldn’t stand to be alone, so he went to Carlos’s instead and slept on his sofa for a couple of days. He gave her three days to cool down and then he went back, prepared to crawl for it. He had bought roses and everything and she let him in. He didn’t need to crawl. The roses however, never made it inside the house, he found them on the compost the next day. It took a week before she talked to him again and another before she was too horny to deny him the bed any longer and he could finally leave the sofa. After he had fucked her thoroughly and she came down in his arms, he explained and apologized. She pulled him close and kissed him, but didn’t say anything more. Well, he had handled her similarly when she had screwed up, so he probably deserved that. He didn’t complain, he was just glad to have her in his arms again. They didn’t talk about it again, that is until today. He had thought that she had forgotten about it, but apparently, she hasn’t.

He drives around for a couple of hours and it is only when he is sure that Beth has gone to bed that he returns to the house. He parks his car in the driveway and makes his way to the door. He is surprised to see the lights are still on in the living room and contemplates returning to his car. But he concludes that she has probably just forgotten to turn them off. Also, now that the anger has subsided somewhat, he feels guilty. He has a right to be angry, he tells himself. Hasn’t he proved sufficiently that he is all in? He has been there for her ever since she has told him about the pregnancy with the exception of this one slip. How can she still believe that the paternity test makes any difference? 

When he steps inside she is sitting on the sofa, watching TV, looking dead tired. Great, another thing to feel guilty about. He knows how exhausted she has been the past weeks and now he is responsible for another night of lost sleep. Her head turns as soon as she hears the door. She looks at him uncertainly. Apparently, she feels just as guilty as he does. The rest of his anger leaves the building and he flops down next to her. They speak at the same time.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry.” He looks up at her and smiles a little. She scoots close to him and cuddles against his side. They don’t say anything for a few minutes. When she speaks again, her words surprise him.

“I want to move.” His eyebrows rise and he pushes her from him a little so he can look at her.

“Why?” She looks into his eyes earnestly and begins to explain.

"The house isn't big enough anyway," she says. He gives her a questioning look, knowing full well that she isn't telling him the whole story.

"That all?" he asks.

“I never really realized that my past with Dean bothers you. I can see that this house might not be the ideal home, if we want this family to work out.”

“Is that so?”

“You only ever brought one bag of your clothes over. The rest of the stuff is mine and a lot of it I picked out with Dean. We never really discussed you moving in or moving in together somewhere else. You shouldn’t feel like a guest or a replacement. I really want you here.” He bends down and kisses her.

“I want to be here. I thought I made that clear. I thought you knew that I’m all in, that Ria’s my daughter no matter what some test says.” And he has managed to make her cry. He hates it when she cries, but then again, it’s kind of unavoidable living together with a woman and especially one whose hormones are still in turmoil after giving birth just a month ago.

“Yes, I know that,” she says. “I just thought that being sure, would make you realize that you’re not just here because I want you here but because you belong here.” He pulls her close again and they both shift so that they lie down. He briefly thinks about picking her up and carrying her upstairs, but then he would have to come down again and pick Ria up as well and he feels entirely too exhausted to make the way upstairs twice. So, he decides that they are going to sleep on the sofa. Plus, less space means more skin contact with his woman. And for a brief second, he thinks that he should be able to finish that last sentence with another word entirely. That word being wife. 

He is almost asleep when she speaks again. “And f.y.i., she really is your daughter.”

“I know," he whispers and smiles against her hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are encouraged and greatly appreciated!
> 
> You might have noticed that I did not include a lot of Annie/Eddie time. As I have started work again a couple of weeks back my writing time is very limited. To leave the story unfinished nagged at me. That is why I though of maybe giving these two their own little story that I would post in one go when it's finished. Any takers?

**Author's Note:**

> Though not the first fic I have ever written, this is the first I have ever posted. So please be gentle. I would love to hear what you think.


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